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Those obsessed with so-called experts should thank their lucky stars that Wikipedia does not have an article about ∩niverse.

The ∩niverse was created when Jesus bumped into the Universe and knocked the U upside-down. He was in a hurry to deliver tissues to his Dad.


This all started when God decided he wanted to blow his nose and sent Jesus down to the shops for some tissue. On returning from the shop Jesus was highly groggy as he had tripped on his shoe and fallen in a keg of mead. He fell over and on attempting to grab something to stop him from falling he grabbed the "U" and knocked it over thereby creating The ∩niverse. As a side effect the Cniverse was created, but that only lasted a few moments because of spiral conditioning.

Considered by many to be one of the greatest nose-based cock-ups of Creation, the alternate ∩niverse went along with it anyway and the molestating was accidentally released. Utilizing the Doc's invention of Delorian Time, ∩ was able to transport itself with the flux capacitor into our own Universe during roughly the Greek trimester, infusing itself into liguistics at the time.


Speculation as to the still-continued existence of the ∩niverse after the removal of its prime continues and awaits response in Michael J. Fox's upcoming scientific report, Back to the Future XIV - News From ∩se, but most speculate that a non-primed Niverse would succumb to marketing data and fold. Alternate theories exist, such as that the Niverse followed ∩ through the Delorian space-time rectum and is actually already here in the split duality sneakers of Converse and Nike. For that reason, you rarely see one entity wearing simultaneously a Converse AND a Nike shoe for fear of being split asunder by the rectal hole itself.

Notable Quotes[edit]

"T∩ be or not t∩ that is the question" - William Shakespeare

"I pity tha foo who created the universe" - Mr.∩

"011∩0011 0110∩111 011∩10∩010 0110∩01∩00" - Dick Cheney

"I need to to tell how much i l∩ve ∩" - Tamia

"I just called, to say, I l∩ve ∩." -- Black Guy

See Also[edit]