▓
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“Reply hazy, try again.”
~ Magic 8-Ball on ▓
▓ is a symbol not unlike ▒. ▓ was created as the evil counterpart of Ultimate Jesus. ▓ is also known as DARKSHADE in Microsoft Word because that is its primary attack in pokemon microsoft word edition. ▓ likes to play volleyball, eat cheese, and kill people who try to edit the definition for ▓ in uncyclopedia. Our knowledge of ▓ slowly increases as ◘, who was once ▓'s partner in crime but is now its enemy, spews forth many secrets of the past life of ▓. ▓ is officially married to ▄▄█▀▀ █▬█ █ ▀█▀.
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[edit] History of ▓
[edit] Overview
▓ was, as stated before, created as the counterpart of Ultimate Jesus. It was created by Satan's little brother, Mario. ▓ has had many quests and exploits. When ▓ was four centuries old it was told to find the holy grail but found nothing of interest. When ▓ was just 6 centuries old it was sent to kill George Dubya Bush but failed due to its allergy to Pastrami Sandwiches. It has not been seen since its futile attempt to destroy ◊.
[edit] Early life
▓ was created as the evil counterpart of Ultimate Jesus by Mario but Mario made a mistake no intelligent symbol crafter would make. He forgot to put in the extra cheese. Mario was so shamed by this awful mistake he went away to become a plumber. His little brother, Luigi, followed suit. ▓ was left to fend for itself against dinosaurs and other evil creatures. It learned to create underlings, some of which include █, ■, and ◙.
[edit] Missions
As if it were in a bad RPG, ▓ was sent on many random quests by many random people it just met on the street. Little is known about most of these quests, but some are slighly known.
- The Quest for the Holy Grail: On the Quest for the holy grail, ▓ failed utterly. Searching in the area of present-day Scandanavia, ▓ found nothing but an old boot and a guy named Spud.
- The Quest to stop Dubya: ▓ was once sent to destroy George Dubya Bush in an attempt to stop him from becoming president. During this quest ▓ discovered its allergy to pastrami sandwiches. Little else is known about this quest except that ▓ failed.
- The Journey to Iceland: ▓'s journey to iceland is one of the best documented quests. ▓ was nine centuries old. Using its time travel abilities ▓ went into the Ice Age. ▓ then walked over the ice that was the ocean and arrived at aincient iceland. It then traveled into the present time where it found the flying spaghetti monster. The FSM gave it an amazingly large tuna to bring back home as proof ▓ had been to iceland.
▓ meets the FSM at iceland
- The Fight for Pie: The fight for pie is very ill-recorded. All we know is that it was in 314 AD and that ▓ was fighting against the dreaded ⌂.
- ▓ vs Ultimate Jesus: This fight was well-recorded by christians so the writings are slightly biased. ▓ was almost completely destroyed.
“The heathen thing came down this morning to the cathedral... The rats all started dancing. It walked towards... the statue of Jesus and spoke a few inaudible words. The statue fell completely apart. It was then that we knew that we were about to be totally and utterly pwn3d... Out of the statue came Ultimate Jesus. The thing, a traveler has told me is called ▓, stepped towards Ultimate Jesus. They fought... Ultimate Jesus won. The ▓ slowly crawled away.”
~ Christian Writings on ▓ vs Ultimate Jesus
[edit] Peculiar Happenings in the life of ▓
▓ has done many peculiar things in its life, many that few others could be able to do.
- The Creation of ▓ Jesus: ▓ Jesus, also known as ▓esus, was created when ▓ ate eleven too many beans at its best friend's bachelor party. ▓ created a huge explosion ,ripping a hole in the universe and causing ▓ Jesus to fly out of this rip.
- The Battle of the knee: ▓ was in world war eleven and saw an enemy soldier. The soldier warped to ▓ before it could shoot and said,"Don't do anything or I'll rape you." The soldier was then killed by a flying piece of cheese.
[edit] ▓ in Popular Culture
▓ has appeared in popular culture many times. Sadly most of these, like ▓'s quests, were ill-recorded. Only the best recorded appearances will be shown.
- The Missingno. of the games Pokemon Red and Pokemon Blue bears a slight resemblance to ▓.
- ▓ plays a small, completely confidential, role in the Game but this is not supposed to be released to the general public.
[edit] Future Actions
Like ∩, ▓ will probably come back and kill us all. Little info has been procured for the future revolution. A mysterious note has been discovered, saying:
▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓ ▓ ▓
▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓
▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓▓▓ ▓ ▓
▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓▓ ▓▓▓ ▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓▓ ▓▓▓ ▓▓ ▓▓ ▓▓ ▓ ▓ ▓▓▓ ▓▓▓
▓
▓
▓
This is not much different from the message found from ∩ and may suggest they are working as partners in crime.
[edit] ▓'s Life of Crime
▓ has been charged with rape, molestation, homicide, more homicide, selling pie without a license, and even more homicide. It was found not guilty on all charges because the jury found it stupid to charge a polka-dotted rectangle.
[edit] Properties of ▓
▓ is used often in pies, by sad fairies, and in stevist cults. ▓ represents happiness, but is not unlike pie. The size and radius of the inner loop are one with the number of ▓s on the axis.
