28 Gays Later
69,i mean 28 Gays Later is a post-apocalyptic horror/shocker film released in 2002. It has come to be known as a cult-film in the city of San Francisco.
The film is set in modern London, after the unspeakably horrible virus "molten gay" quickly spreads across the European island. The virus makes the infected increadibly flamboyant and soulless, forcing a small band of the uninfected to come to terms with the new hellish world in which they live, struggling for survival.
The film opens with the manly, heterosexual Chuck Norris waking up in one of his hundreds of girlfriends apartments after a foggy, 28 day bender. Leaving the nunnery, Norris discovers that the city is empty, its streets littered with rainbow confetti and used condoms. Searching through the local streets, Chuck is suddenly attacked by a group of the infected, who's breast implants and massive erections force him to run (not out of fear, Chuck knows no fear) to find his gun shed. Moments later, however, Chuck is saved by an armored group of survivors, known as Mr. T and John Wayne. Chuck learns that during the time he was in coma, 28 Days, the virus spread fast and was now awoken into a land of dread and hellishness. His new companions inform him that the gay had spread on a global scale.
The three decide to travel to the closest military base in order to make their small militia indestructible by the faggoty ways of the gays, who live in constant defiance of the one true lord Jesus Christ. They are forced to stop and sleep overnight. During the night, a pair of gays attack them. Mr.T uses his bling-bling to knock them unconscious. They recover in the morning, locate the base, and find it is already occupied by British soldiers. Mr. Norris waived his right to a fatal roundhouse kick, opting to blind the soldiers with his searing pure golden rays of manliness. The three chums had steak for lunch to increase their virility.
Leaving the base in a tank, the three traveled the mountainsides destroying the infected with their bare hands and grenade launchers. At the end of the film, after clearing the island of sin, an aircraft is seen flying over the island, showing them that the nation had merely been quarantined and that the rest of the world remained at peace, and that someone had come to save them. Seeing this, Chuck norris takes out a grenade launcher and activates it, bringing the aircraft down in flames and the men into a hearty laugh.
The film had a sequel called 28 Twinks Later, where the virus spreads all the way to San Francisco and north.
Another sequel called 28 Gays Later: Rug-Munchers Gone Wild is due for release never.
Interestingly, a church-funded reactionary film was produced in 2067 named "28 Gay Haters" and featured the comedy stylings of Pope Benedict the IVCXXIM.
Oscar Wilde Autobiography
28 Gays Later is also the title of Oscar Wilde's first autobiography. The book details his insatiable desire to be the first entirely straight man to be ejaculated in to 28 times in a row. The book provides a blow by blow account of this groundbreaking event including the famed reconstructive sphincteroplasty and months of cruel rehabilitation. Illustrations by Edward Munch.