2 Calorie War
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“The union must be preserved between these to calories or i shall give thee liberty or death.”
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[edit] The 2 Calorie War
[edit] Mystery
Until recently no information has been released by either the Republicans or the Democrats relating to the two calorie war. It would have remained a mystery as well, if it weren't for a Japanese person finding an English (American) Dictionary and looking up the word 'Break' the American (English) Dictionary itself was later executed for sharing American secrets with foreigners.
However, Japanese remained puzzled over the definition of Break, they found it difficult to comprehend taking time out of work for fifteen minutes to stretch and drink something. It caused much confusion in the continent of Japan and forced the Americans to tell the world of a secret war that started in 2001 and ended in 2003.
[edit] The War
The "expend no more then 2 calories getting something" law was put into practice by the Republicans in 2001. Naturally, common enemy of the Republican the Democrats were against it. At first this was thought very little of, as the Democrats disagree with the Republicans regardless, but later it was found out how serious they were.
The Democrats demanded 3 calories instead of 2, but the Republicans said that 2 was more than 1, therefore more than Necesarry. This enraged the Democrats forcing them to unleash their secret weapon: Nuclear Powered Rocket Launchers that Fire Chainsaws. Code named 'NPRLFC XP'.
So a terrible nuclear war was fought, between the Democrats and Republicans in the end, the Communists won.
This was known as the two Calorie war.
[edit] Source
Only one historian knows of the events that took place on that faithful bi-year. An AIM Chat log where he provides never before heard secrets can be found at the following link: The Two Calorie War (among other things)
