3 equals pie
3 Equals Pie is an Order formed by the Dopefish during the 13th century.
Not to be confused with Myspace, the vast and popular mmo that’s taking the nations with storm. The Dopefish, as most of us know, is a very dumb creature. It's in fact so dumb that you probably could trick it to believe that you are it, even though it probably have realised that it is a fish and you are something else, lets say a human. Either way, the dopefish, dumb as it is, came up with an idea sometime during the 13th century (please note that this as it is the first idea the dopefish ever have come up with and yet the only one, but cunning none the less).
The Order Of The 3 Equals Pie
The Order stands for freedom to all those who believe in the great pies that come in three and that we all shall, if a believer, join the mighty pie in the heavens with the rest of the fish. Now not all those who believe are a fish, most of them are lesser creatures, lets say humans and that kind, some are thou of greater status and will join the fish whether they choose believe or not (see Badgers).
Now, the ones whom choose not to believe in the great pie face a grim, but just, future, hunted and killed by the enlightened for sport. Each Saturday (if in Britain, each Sunday after tea) the believers will gather at given locations (see your back yard) so the hunting can begin.
Few have ever survived hunting since the members of the Order tend to be good hunters and skilled marksmen. The ones who do survive face yet another grim future. They need to live with the magical scars from the blue-scarp-things the Orders members use to hunt the non-believers.
The orders' structure can be compared to those that are being used by various cults. All members must give the leader, the dopefish, a part of their belongings. The dopefish usually claims the bottom half. The members must wear a blue coat. No one may speak with people who don’t wear a blue coat, except fish. Members are only allowed to mate at their birth place. Ex-order members are to be killed on sight, even if they are your mother. There are no ex-order members. All members must pray to the fish each day after they have consumed the apple.
We all must ask ourselves, why? Why am I reading this? Well, its simple, You think this is humour. It's not. This is real. There are people living like this each day. The apple is a holy symbol for the order members. To join they must first figure out what the apple really is and represents, then they must consume one each day, until they reach age x (note, age may vary). Why 3 equals pie? Its easy folks. The dopefish isn't a math wizz, so unlike us, it figured out the true meaning of pie, 3. it’s not 3.14...something. Pie = 3. If you wish to gain a satisfying result, please add some mortar to even it up.
It's sad that this is a parable for certain religions out there. That certain religion just so happens to be just that....cold,dead, religion....but there is Truth out there. It's a relationship with Jesus christ and it doesn't involve all of this. God didn't make religion, man did. God made a relationship. That is what He desires.
|The author of this article doesn't care at all if you edit it, heck, your stuff is probably funnier than mine.|