900 numbers

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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the "questionable parody" of this website called Wikipedia think they have an article about 900 numbers.

Special long distance numbers that work exactly like 800, 888, 877, 666 and 411 numbers. Except that they take a note out on your house, and do not let you have a telephone in your name until you pay them their high fees. These numbers are often used for by men talking to other men looking to talk with women.

The technology behind 900 numbers and other dial-it services is complex. Needed are two dixie cups, a ball of string and a hunk of wax. A hole is poked through the cups and the string is then fed through the hole. A knot is tied to keep the string from pulling back through the hole. The string must be waxed the length of the desired line. Once waxed, the cups are gingerly pulled apart until the the string is taut. Person A then tells the tee to person B at the other end. Person C collects a per minute charge, the whole time promising it gets better the longer they keep talking or listening. If Persons A & B are both heterosexual males, all that needs to be said is "Any women?"

Dial it services[edit]

Dial-it services started back in the year 900 CE with friars wandering from town to town telling the neighboring hamlet's gossip in return for food and lodging. When technology caught up with the need for gossip, Anti American Telephone (AA&T) was able to charge for chat lines.

Local phone companies were the first to offer dial it services in the form of 976 numbers. With the local divestiture of the baby balls telephone companies, AA&T had to act quick to ingrain the use of the long distance lines so as to enter the billing cycles.