9035768

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The number 9035768 was once though to be 336505840 backwards. Now it is known that it isn't. Other than that it has no significance whatsoever. There is no point for this article. It should not even exist. The fact that it exists has puzzled many and has become the big question of our time.

Peter bogdanovich.jpg THE BOG SAYS
*s..i..i..g..g..h..h..h..*
I'm sure there was a brilliant point in here somewhere, uhhhh... where was that exactly?

Suggested Reasons For The Article's Existence[edit]

Evolution[edit]

Most scientists believe that this article came about through evolution. It started as a single-lettered word, evolved into a whole word, and eventually became an article. Scientists point to the fact that the article can undergo change over time and probably has done so in the past. Proponents of intelligent design have called this theory blasphemy and blame the devil for making it up.

Evolutionists have recently pointed to changes in the article, such as adding ? at the end of "Why Was This Article Created" making it "Why Was This Article Created?" and changing "This" to "The" in "Suggested Reasons For This Article's Existence", now "Suggested Reasons For The Article's Existence". Evolutionists also point to this new paragraph as evidence. Evolutionists point out that since the article began it has evolved 17 times. Opponents say that such great changes in such a short period of time, including heading could only be achieved by an intelligent force.

Intelligent Design[edit]

Others believe that this article must have been designed by an intelligent being. They point to the complexity in the article and say that it is not possible that it just evolved. They claim that any changes the article undergoes is because of the intelligent designer. Proponents of evolution have called this theory unscientific and a substitute for intelligent thinking.

Why Was This Article Created?[edit]

Besides how the article came into being people ponder why it was created. What is it's purpose? There are several different answers.

Punishment From God[edit]

Some proponents of intelligent design believe God was the designer, and suggest that God is trying to punish us by making this completely meaningless article that we are doomed to stare at for all eternity.

The Devil[edit]

Another reason suggested by evangelists is that the devil put the number on this page to cause people to waste their time pondering this page and keeping them from finding God.

Alien Invasion[edit]

Some, such as Tom Cruise Fans believe that the article was set up by aliens in a plot to take over Earth.

Subliminal Advertising[edit]

SomeGive WalMartbelieveall your moneythat the article is used bylet corpverizonorations to traspy onnsmit sublimiyounal messages. This is definitely false. There is no reason whysupport overanyonseas sweate woushopsld post sugo to Iraqbliminal messages on something like uncyclopedia. Still, people wonder why theybuyjust can'tglassstop reading the article over and ovcondomser again.

CIA Conspiracy[edit]

Conspiracy theorists think this article is a CIA conspiracy to control your mind. This is of course complete rubish created by hippy, liberal conspiracy theorists trying to bring down capitalism and put us under a narcissist_theocracy. Now, please keep your eyes wind open and don't blink for 5 seconds while staring at these numbers, "9035768". Wait 10 seconds for a flash and follow the instructions. If you don't see a flash within 10 seconds go to your nearest police station and ask to see Agent Smith.

No Reason[edit]

Some people believe that the article has no purpose. Its existence is entirely meaningless. In fact the article doesn't even exist.

Religious Views on 9035768[edit]

Judaeo-Christian[edit]

According to Jews and Christians this article was created as punishment for when one user tempted another user into stealing an apple. Now, all users must suffer through this long and meaningless article in order to attain eternal salvation. If they leave the article before it is time they will suffer damnation by the article's creator.

Islam[edit]

Muslims believe the article is an idol intended to blaspheme against their religion and believed it was intended to portray them as violent. Any belief that Muslims are violent is now disproven since Muslims took to the streets and burned down cities to prove they weren't.

Hindu[edit]

Hindus believe that the article was created by a committee of users. They believe that as the article becomes more full of useless garbage it will reach the point where it will be deleted, but then the committee will come together again and create another meaningless article, and the cycle continues.

Scientology[edit]

Scientologists believe that the article was created so people would forget they were really aliens, and Xenu could run their lives. They only way to save yourself from the article is to give all your money to Tom Cruise.

Satanism[edit]

Satanists believe that this article is a ploy to take away from the supreme number, 666.