AMMO

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Bullets. The more you have, the more people you can shoot.

“AMMO, Huh!”

~ Oscar Wilde on AMMO

“SPLUUUGE!”

~ Cum on Barnwell's Ma

“In Soviet Russia Bomb Builds You!”

“Thats not even funny anymore... in fact it is getting really old.”

~ Barnwell on His Mom

“You're right, she is getting really old.”

~ Everyone on Barnwell's Ma

Ammo, often referred to as ammunition, is a generic term derived from the French language le munition which embraced all material used for war (from the Latin fracto, to fuck shit up), but which in time came to refer specifically to gunpowder and artillery. The collective term for all types of ammunition is munitions. In the widest sense of the word it covers anything that can be used in combat that includes bombs, missiles, zombies, sploding puppies, Barnwell's ma, toilet bowls, forks and other bits of silverware that you can jam in a pirate cannon, sausage-to-air missiles, warheads, and mines (landmines, naval mines, air mines, swamp mines, french mimes and anti-personnel mines) – that munitions factories manufacture.. The purpose of ammunition is predominantly to project force against a selected target. However, the nature of ammunition use also includes delivery or combat supporting munitions such as pyrotechnic or incendiary compounds. Since the design of the cartridge, the meaning has been transferred to the assembly of a projectile and its propellant in a single package.

IYAAYAS[edit]

The subject of ammunition is a complex one which covers application of fire to targets, general use of weapons by personnel, explosives and propellants, cartridge systems, high explosive projectiles (HE), warheads, Shaped charge forms of attack on armour and aircraft, carrier projectiles, fuzes, mortar ammunition, small arms ammunition, grenades, mines, pyrotechnics, improved conventional munitions, and terminally guided munition.

It also refers to the US Air Force career field who pride themselves in drinking beer, shouting and turning wrenches. In thier off duty time they mainly just like to drink beer and shout.

Types of AMMO[edit]

Harding has the same reaction to menial tasks.

A Cartridge, is a single unit of ammunition; for a modern small arms cartridge this is the combination of bullet, propellant, primer and cartridge case in a single unit. Nintendo games used to be called cartridges, until someone corrected the Japanese engrish and informed them that guns are not in fact toys.

A "round" is term synonymous with cartridge. It is also the term Barnwell's Ma uses when she refers to being "in shape", round is in fact a shape.

Large caliber guns often fire explosive-filled projectiles known as shells, non-explosive projectiles may be used for practice (see artillery). Shells found on the beach make excellent homes for hermit crabs and they can also be used to make a nice macromay necklace for your girlfriend on Valentines Day.

Large numbers of small projectiles intended to be fired all at once in a single discharge are also called shot; hand-held guns designed for this type of ammunition are generally known as shotguns. The sounds that these handguns make is commonly refered to as gun shots. The Beastie Boys have a less than popular song called sure shot. During the flue season nurses will administer flu shots, not to be confused with buck shot which is in fact not effective against the common flu virus. When you blow your load in a nice young ladies eye it is called a money shot which is the equivalent of non-leathal munitions.

Duds are explosive filled ordnance that fail to function as intended. A cartridge that fails to fire in the weapon is known as a misfire. Dud ammunition is regarded as highly dangerous and also known as UXO, and most safety officials inform civilians to report finding of any large-bore duds to the local police or military. Dud AMMO troops are also known as "Hardings". Hardings are also regarded as highly dangerous as they also fail to function as intended. They do however grow hair really fast and have been known to change vehicle tires with only a stare.

Sausage-to-Air Missile

Hand Grenades

Pink Paint Balls

Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

Famous AMMO Troops[edit]

Christine Carder - known to be one of the two AMMO troops in the career field to actually shed a tear. (regularly)

Stripe from the Gremlins - actually he is the first AMMO troop.

Marty Bigbee "The Pimple Eater"- known by all as the AMMO troop who eats her face!!

Jeffrey Neahr "The Ninja" - known as the one who missed the deer, and hit a tree.

Justin "The Legend in his own mind" Sambor - known for his legendary imagination and thinking he is funnier than he really is.

Jesse "Nah Holmes" Carlin - known for knockin out the fatties and saying "it's hard to do things"

Patrick "Navaconda" Navarette - known for his Jane Fonda like attitude about trouser snakes.

Joseph "The Douche" Radouchevich - is known to look through his wife's purse in search of his balls.

Miguel "Drama King" Diaz - more drama than a daytime soap opera, lazier than the housewife that watches them.

Hardings Mustache - just his facial hair is famous.

Harrell "Big Red" Singley - His glamourous red hair and light complextion are known world wide and his temper is feared by two or three other gingers

Billy "The Porn Doc" Olsen - His penchant for one legged midget's is disturbing.

David "Mike" Lowery - Spreading his seed across the world and even space, one drunken conquest at a time.

Eric "The Drunken Rocket" Mosier - Known for blazing the Kawi 1000 through the narrow streets of Tuman with a BAC of .3

Luke Glasscock - YES HIS LAST NAME IS GLASSCOCK!

Craig "WoW" Gurnicz - Still plays wow and takes himself off this silly list.

Amber "The Hough" Houghton - Author of great books such as "How to Lead from the Rear" and "Getting Ahead by Kneeling". Also coined the phrase "You Houghtoned Me", which means to know nothing about something, but to insist it be done entirely different than it should be done.

Marlana Brannan - Her name backwards spells ANALRAM for a reason.

Russell "Nicklenuts" Bramblett - There is not enough room on the internet to describe him.

Rebbeca "You know what i'm saying" Cooper - Skeletor will rise again!

Isaac "I'm too sexy for my shirt" Portillio - I cant run for PT. I need all my calories for lifting!

Henry "Thai Sausage" Wilson - Uhhh girl!!!!

Matthew "Go Team" Baca - Tried to take his name off this list, is still going to be on this list!

Dustin "Zudool the Noodle" Zudell - I heard it from somewhere, or someone told me, or I think I saw.

Sean "The Chin" Melody - Once saved Ireland by peeling all of the nation's potatoes with his EPIC CHIN!!!

Robert "Damn LIberals" Scyoc - Head or Throat?!?!?!

Davie "DELALALALALALALALALA" Cruz - Another to use the most overused phrase....."Late"

AMMO Bases[edit]

An ammunition dump, ammunition compound, ammunition depot, MSA, Munitions Storage Area, hang out, landfill, ISO village, bomb dump or ammo dump, is a military storage facility for live ammunition and explosives. AMMO troops also go there to hang out between paychacks. The storage of live ammunition and explosives is inherently hazardous, especially when you see the trained monkeys that get paid to do the job. There is the potential for accidents in unloading, packing and transfer, highly trained high school drop outs that have recently quit smoking dope to enlist in the Chair Force, the threat of theft, misuse or sabotage, and, if neglected, the near-certainty that poorly stored explosives will degrade and become shock-sensitive over time.

AMMO Squadron/Flight[edit]

Production Flight[edit]

Conventional Maintenance[edit]

more commonly known as correctional maintenance

Precision Guided Munitions[edit]

if the pilot says it's broken we wipe it down with GP, and "POOF", it's fixed. Then it's back to bones or spades and we go home. When the missile makes its way back to the jet it stays there for another 20 flights or 180 days. (which ever occurs 2nd)

Line Delivery[edit]

abbreviated L/D, which is also the AF acronym for late

Trailer Maintenance[edit]

if you end up in this element you will be asking yourself, "who did I piss off?"

Material Flight[edit]

Storage[edit]

have you seen those "so easy a caveman can do it" commercials?

Inspection[edit]

commonly refered to as BB counters

AFK[edit]

"Ammo Fat Kids" loosely and lovingly refered to as "accountability". Somehow also became known as AFV for some damn reason. (Former supply code, idiot!)

Systems Flight[edit]

Control[edit]

...repeat your call sign and go....

Training[edit]

no one in the career filed knows why the are called training since they actually don't train anyone on anything, sometimes if you are really lucky they can give you the number of the person to call and get scheduled for training, but only on the second Tuesday of the sixth week of every other month in a leap year

UDM[edit]

hahaha....UDM is given the daunting task of prepping people to deploy....now only if they could stop playing "Bubble Shooter"....

Everyone who wishes they were AMMO[edit]

Armament Troops aka "Load Toads"

The guys who put the bombs AMMO builds on the aircraft. In fact, they should be called "load leeches" since they just leech off the AMMO troops.

Nuclear Weapons aka "Nuke Pukes"

Those that are the ”PUKES” claim that they have a job, but the truth is the will actually go their whole career with no expenditures.

Missile and Space Systems aka "CAL-CUM"

A rare breed indeed. In fact, that’s all we have to say about them since they really don’t exists. This segment of the article is just a figment of your imagination.

AMMO Sayings[edit]

If you ain't AMMO, you ain't shit! (IYAAYAS)"!!(But others know it as "If you aint ammo your waiting on them") This term is argued by many for it’s un-truths in statement. ”If you are indeed not AMMO, then you are not shit.” Implying that AMMO is a steamy pile of shit and everybody that is not AMMO smells of roses. Anyone associated with AMMO argues the cultural agreement that the term shit can be used as a term of endearment. Example: “Dude, you are the SHIT!” or “That shit is the shit dawg!” This heated debate has seen no true winner in argument but will continue to be fueled by those who do not appreciate shit like AMMO.

Some people say AMMO Sucks, to which the standard reply is:

Tits, clits and beer cans, and sometimes army wives