Adhesive Wars of 1820
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[edit] Tensions Rise
Just 20 years after the creation of super glue Plutonian scientists invented perfect glue. Despite having the words "glue" and "perfect" in it's name, perfect glue had no practical use as an adhesive as it would only stick to other fastening devices such as staples. Despite this fact, the Super Glue High Command (SGHC) felt immensely threatened by it's creation. Expecting a long and pointless war to break out the SGHC started creating powerful glue guns to give them the upperhand in the conflict.
[edit] War
March 3rd, 1820. Pro-super glue radicals attack a perfect glue factory, giving horrible burns to all it's employees with their scalding hot glue guns. The company that produced perfect glue, Plutonian Arms Inc., were caught off guard by the sudden attack on their factory. In response, they launched a full scale assault on the SGHC, located a mere two blocks from their HQ in a heavily populated city. Thousands of civilians were killed when tanks started rolling out of the Plutonian Arms building and into the city streets, crushing anything and everything in their path and several things far off their path. The SGHC was caught off guard watching re-runs of Everyone Loves Raymond on Pluto and huffing kittens, half their number were killed within the first thirty minutes of the battle. The remaining half fought back in a valliant, yet pointless fashion with their glue-based weaponry. However, their glue guns could not pierce the heavy armor of the tanks. In a completely retarded attempt to save themselves and win the war, the surviving members of the SGHC stormed the duct tape factory across the street. Unfortunately, the company that manufactured duct tape also produced flame throwers and machetes. The resulting conflict is way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way too horrible to be described to anyone ever.
[edit] Aftermath
With the complete destruction of super glue, perfect glue and duct tape were allowed to dominate the markets of Pluto. Until, that is, totally fucking amazing glue came on the scene, but that is another tale for another time.
