Naruto
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Naruto (ナルト, NARUTO) is one of those Japanese things that came from Japan. Created by Masashi Kishimoto, it includes "ninjas", violence, gore, and great character development. Kishimoto claims to have included these aspects into the series since "It's what the kids dig, man." The series has been a huge sucess worldwide for unexplainable reasons, and has made Kishimoto a very rich man. Due to the immense popularity of the anime adaptation of the series, Kishimoto is sure to have made even more money.
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[edit] Plot
Twelve years before the start of the series, Naruto Uzumaki was born. And there was a big stink about a giant racoon or something. Naruto was a social reject until he beat up a ninja. He got away with it by claiming that the ninja was evil. Naruto was made a ninja himself for his "brave actions".
Naruto, however, is still a scrub! The non-scrub ninjas select him to be put in Team 7, with two fellow scrubs. So these three young ninja are assigned to form a three-person team under an experienced ninja named Kakashi Hatake.
[edit] Characters
Nobody likes characters without personality. But too much personality can make the manga just characters bragging about themselves. Naruto treads this line by heavily featuring many of its characters in one story arc, removing them for several story arcs, and plopping them down back in the plot later with a new look. The following characters are (mostly) exempt from this rule due to their importance.
Naruto Uzumaki
When they were giving out brains, Naruto got what is believed to be a red panda brain instead. The plot revolves around Naruto and "pals" doing some stuff and playing Nintendo. His classmates make fun of him for his bright orange costume and raspy voice. He is also thought of as a massive prick.
Naruto has exactly two techniques throughout the entire series: creating multiple, slightly more annoying versions of himself using "Shadow Clones", and putting all of his teenage angst into a tiny blue ball of chakra whilst shoving it into one's chest, back, or groin area. All other techniques are variations on these two techniques. Naruto somehow expects to become the greatest ninja in his entire village and leader of the free ninja world knowing how to do exactly two things.
Sasuke Uchiha
Naruto's first team-mate. He wants to have revenge against his brother Itachi for killing his whole family except for him - making Sasuke a true role model for 12-year-old children like him everywhere. Seeing everyone he loved murdered before his eyes has also caused him to act all dark and angsty. In addition to all of this, he swallowed the series' main villain, Orochimaru.
Sakura Haruno
Formerly almost entirely useless, Sakura has notably developed high-level medical skills and monstrous strength, due to her newfound strong willpower and an extensive amount of training with the legendary sannin Tsunade, aka "The Legendary Sucker For these reasons, Sakura represents the single greatest change of a characterever in Naruto.
The leader of Team 7, who spends most of his time protecting his students and keeping them unified. However, he was not a good enough leader to keep a 12-year-old Sasuke from defecting to one of the major villains' side. It also might have been because of that one technique he often used...
Sai
Sasuke's replacement. Unlike angsty teenagers who merely whine about how they have no social skills, Sai really does not, in fact, have any social skills, as instead of actual experience his Umbridgian superiors forced him to get acquainted with the subject through a series of educational videos (this is not said outright, but heavily implied). Sai also happens to be completely obsessed with mocking the genitalia of little boys. Sai's main weapon is the deadly art of insultery, as seen in the following example.
Sai: You're weak. Do you even have a penis?
Guybrush: Why? Did you want to borrow one? (Guybrush wins).
Yamato
Kakashi's temporary replacement. He's really good at growing wood.
Jiraiya
A typical, boring, generic, perverted, old man. His story involvement is "small" at first but gets "larger" as the "plot" progresses. His story eventually reaches its "climax" when he enters the Akatsuki "hideout".
Orochimaru
Black-haired, pale, and noseless, Orochimaru is a major antagonist. He was the source of many of the events of the series until he died unexpectedly on 25th June 2009. Many servants of Orochimaru flocked to his hideout to pay their respects.
Tsunade
The 5th Hokage, whose most distinctive feature is her large, round, eyes. Before she became Hokage, she was known as "The Legendary Sucker".[1] She had a maid named Shizune, however she was killed by some guy named Pain. Two of the three Legendary Sannin have been killed, although whether you'd class Michael, er, Orochimaru as dead I don't know. Tsunade is under coma after seeing Naruto stripped in front of her.
Akatsuki
An evil, evil organization who wants to capture all of the giant animals in the world. Its members are killed off one by one shortly after they take off their cloaks. Many fans believe their cloaks are composed of mithril.
Sasuke's older brother, who killed the entire Uchiha family (except for Sasuke). The reason why he acted that way, long time ago, Itachi took too much Sake that time, then he raped his mother, and guess who was born? Well, I wonder why he killed his entire family. Actually, the whole family were plotting to boycott the fella' by taking away his allowance. Poor guy. One of the Akatsuki's most prominent members and the one with the potential to overtake Deidara in both popularity and fan-girls. Once was a bad-ass bad guy, but after later being revealed to have been protecting Sasuke all along, he became a not-so-bad-ass tragic hero in accordance with The Laws of Anime Physics. Thirteen fangirls committed suicide upon his death.
That Person
A mysterious Person about which nothing is known, except that he/she/it caused "That Incident" by using "That Technique". Many people, including most of Akatsuki, have claimed to be That Person, but none of them have ever been able to prove it.
[edit] Anime
If a manga manages to stick around for a while, it will usually receive an anime adaptation. Naruto's anime adaptation is most notable for its year-long streak of fillers (episodes not derived from the manga), which were critically acclaimed by almost everyone who watched them. The fillers served as the Jar-Jar Binks-style comic relief to the Qui-Gon-style blandness of the manga storyline.
But if downloading a subtitled Japanese broadcast version isn't your forté, you'll be interested in the English adaptation which airs on Adult Swim's TV-PG-oriented evening lineup. Don't worry if you don't know what anyone's talking about. Watch enough episodes and you'll be tearing through the anime as effectively as Sasuke's Chidori tore through Sabaku no Gaara's Suna no Tate during the third Chunin exams! [2]
[edit] Fandom
“KISHI U SUCK ASS!!! WHY U TAKING MANGA IN THIS DRECTION?? THESE R NOT UR DECISIONS 2 MAKE KISHI!! ONLY U COULD RUIN A SERIES IN LESS THAN 20 PAGES!!![3]”
~ A Concerned Fan on Naruto
As seen above, many fans have constructive criticism for Naruto. Not all fans are like this, however. Many fans have blind, unrelenting faith in the series. These "Naruphiles" are zombie-like in their endless support of the series. The following is a Naruphile's response to the above quote.
“Kishi kicks ass! screw ALL HATERS! Naruto knocks all the other shows dead with "1000 years of deATH!!!" Wooot! woot! Yeah, in yer fuckin face crash n' burn !”
~ Naruphile on Naruto
Note the subtle interplay between the respective first sentences. The first fan applies capitalization liberally, while the second mostly shuns it except for two inexplicable outbursts.
[edit] References
- ↑ No really.
- ↑ If this sentence makes any sense to you, I deeply and sincerely apologize for introducing you to the Naruto anime.
- ↑ Later proven false by another record. New Record
[edit] See Also
 Quasi-Featured Article (19:07, 4 October 2007 (UTC))This article was nominated to become a featured article; however, due to several votes being devoured by an Uruk-hai, it didn't make the cut (14.5/17). Don't let this happen again! For just pennies a day, you can prevent another travesty of this nature, or vote for other articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
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