Al Paris

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Al Paris is the capital city of The Islamic Republic of Frankistan (La république islamique du Frankistan). This is an Islamic country located in Western Europe, known as France until the Jihad of 2005. The Country borders with Germany, Italy, Poland and Pakistan. It has the largest Muslim population in the World.

Population[edit]

Al Paris has a population of 32.6.

  • Celebrities include:

History[edit]

Al Paris was formerly known as Paris, before the Jihad of 2005. The capital of the Islamic Republic of Frankistan used to have major roads, massive buildings and a population of about 2,000,000; most of whom women in bikinis.

In 2005, the Great Jihad made an end to Paris, changing the name into Al Paris. The Great Jihad killed most of the population, leaving 32.6 people alive, most of them celebrities.

In 2006.1, the famous artist Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was given temporary residency in Al Paris to work on his album Nuclear Winter. For research purposes, the great nuclear reactor of El-Naklawar was deliberately overheated, resulting into a nuclear meltdown. Ahmadinejad said that he will be forever grateful to the city of Al Paris and the revenue of his recording will be donated completely to the city, mainly to build more mosques and buy bikinis for all women.

Attractions[edit]

The biggest attraction of Al Paris is without doubt the Aw'Full-Towr minaret, formerly known as the Eiffel Tower. Since the Jihad of 2005, the Eiffel Tower has been part of the Islamic Republic of Frankistan.

Another imporant attraction is the Bastille, since the Jihad of 2005 known as Al-Bahstiya. This used to be a famous Gay French Dance Club, famous for its raunchy leather S&M required dresswear. To this day, with only a short incursion in 1789, the Bastille has been the utmost in exclusive Dance Clubs, with a longer line than most amusement park rides.

Information for visitors[edit]

For men[edit]

Men without beards are not admitted to Al Paris. You also need to carry at all times a copy of the Koran and a photo of Sheikh Al-Jaak Shihrak.

For women[edit]

Women have to wear at all times a bikini, the smaller the better. They are also required to carry at all times a copy of the Koran and a photo of Sheikh Al-Jaak Shihrak.

For children[edit]

Children are not admitted to Al Paris as they are regarded as highly dangerous to the Muslim society of Al Paris. They have to be left at the border, where childminding is provided. Celebrities such as the Muffin Man, Arnold Schwarzenegger and the former king of Prussia, Gerard Depardieu entertain children for free in the basement of the building once known as the Louvre.

What to bring to Al Paris[edit]

  • It's a good idea to always carry sunscreen as the average temperature of Al Paris is 65°C, due to the meltdown of El-Naklawar, the only nuclear power plant in Al Paris.
  • The Koran must be carried at all times by both men and women.
  • A photo of Sheikh Al-Jaak Shihrak is compulsory.
  • If you are a man, a fake beard to stick on could be helpful.
  • Your passport must be carried at all times and must be translated into Arabic before arrival.
  • A lot of money, preferably a strong currency like the Kazakhstan Tenge or Bhutan Buttons, to bribe border control in case you forgot one of the items listed above.

What not to carry to Al Paris[edit]

  • There are no need to bring a Ak-47, you can buy it in every supermarket.

Eating in Al Paris[edit]

  • There are lots of good eateries in Al Paris. Highly recommended is the pizza restaurant Buddha's Heaven, run by the great Buddha herself.