Alan Parsons

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Contents

[edit] Overture

(Instrumental)

[edit] Radio Song

Alan Jean-Baptiste Parsons (b. 1952 Buckinghamstfordshire, England, UK, d. 1990, Berlin, Germany) was a British roadie-turned-musician.

Alan dropped out of school at seventeen to pursue a career as Pink Floyd's roadie. It was reported that he could carry one Marshall 4x12" cabinet in each hand, and one more under each arm, up six flights of stairs without help.

When asked about the vicissitudes of the roadie business, Parsons simply said, "Games people play / you take it or you leave it".

[edit] Ballad

Over the course of the 70's, Parsons became increasingly dependent on steroids to enhance his roadying abilities. When his roid rage became more than even the sad sack of stoners which made up Pink Floyd could handle, they unceremoniously fired him. But Parsons was determined to go straight and make something out of himself. "In the dawn of the morning sky", he said, "the eagle will rise again."

[edit] Vaguely Avant-Garde Piece

Parsons spent most of 1975 in a cottage high up in the Austrian alps, writing strange songs on scraps of papyrus and primitive digital sequencers stolen from Patrick Moraz. The end result was his debut album, "Tales of Mystery and Imagination from Topographic Oceans". A concept album based on the short fiction of William S. Burroughs, ToMaIfTO was released on 20th Century Records on Labour day of 1976, and met with widespread critical bewilderment.

[edit] Radio Song #2

After selling 500 million records and topping every known album chart (and several uncharted ones), Parsons decided to take his Alan Parsons Project on tour around the world.

But the strain of superstardom was more than Alan could handle. He became very depressed and sought psychiatric help from one Dr. Evil. Apparently, Parsons had a recurring dream (within a dream) that was bothering him. It wasn't kodachrome or black-and-white, and it was in dolby stereo but he never heard it right.

[edit] Filler Piece

(Instrumental)

[edit] Depressing Finale

In Spring of 1990, Alan Parsons died alone in a hotel room in Berlin of a probable acetaminophen overdose caused by taking too many Tylenol Threes in one go. A handwritten note found at the scene read as follows:

Look at me now / A shadow of the man I used to be.

Coroners ruled the death suicide. Or, as they say in Germany, Seppuku.

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