From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search

Albany (AKA Albz or A-town) is a town in Westralia, with a current population of 40-something thousand, Although the vast majority of people are either old yuppies who have come to "settle down in a nice little place near the ocean" or a bunch of try-hard wiggers who hang around with aboriginals out the front of Hungry Jacks and KFC.

Things to do in Albany[edit]

Albany, really has nothing to do. You can go down the beach, but you'll only find a bunch of shit surfers and 14-year-olds who reckon they "surf" by laying down on a glorified peice of fucking plastic. Some Albanians as they are called like to go down York Street and look cool, whilst visiting one of two (Yes, now two huuuge ones!) surf shops or going to a try-hard mall and looking in K-Mart and Target before getting bored and going to HJ's and meeting stoners, drug addicts or just a bunch of little 16-year-old girls with tiny skirts on.

What Not to do in Albany[edit]

Do no, under any curcumstances decide to live in Albany - it's a fucking boring shit-hole where a Pre-Season AFL match was a fucking year highlight for the hole. When in Albany don't go to the Lesiure Centre, all you'll find are a bunch of retards shitting in the pool and seeing 8-year old kids pissing in the pool next to you. Also, a lot of 12-year-old girls hang around there with their little boyfriends who crowd around to watch a kiss "OMFG, What a "slut'! she fucking kissed him! ZOMFG!".

Don't go to the skate park, Especially if you have no friends and lacking popularity and/or you can't skate or BMX at all. Don't go down there if you don't have a bike worth over $1500 or don't wear skinny jeans and emo-esque studded belts and tight hoodies and shirts.