Antilope

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Antilopes are small deer-like animal which lives in the woods and surfaces between the hours of dusk until dawn in order to terrorise unsuspecting motorists. They are also renown for their unorthodox defence strategies. Antilopes are also known as the evil, South African Planotee, a being of pure dark antimatter.

Here we see my Aunt elope.

[edit] Defence

Antilopes are often vulnerable to predators when in the absence of the closely related lopes. When threatened by a predator in the presence of lopes (this is common as lopes and antilopes share the same habitat), an antilope will combine with a lope to form a being of pure energy.

This being of pure energy, known as an elope is capable of raising its predators' temperatures to over a thousand degrees celcius, escaping through solid objects (sometimes as large as the Earth) through Quantum Tunnelling and leaping small buildings in one or fewer bounds. When the elope is safe, it decays into a lope, an antilope and an antilope neutrino.

It is a peculiarity of the species that it uses its power only for Good and not for Evil. (For contrast see kittens)

[edit] Rare Sightings

In the last 4 years there have been several sightings of the mysterious flying antelope. one has been captured and it has been found that they're tails are a delicacy comparable to things such as caviar and truffles. A small group of former bird hunters have now turned to antelopes for the high price their tails sell for. it is believed that a long time ago in Tasmania, Australia, an antelope mated with an eagle because there were no other antelopes around. the wings became a dominant characteristic and now there are believed to be at least 100 flying antelopes.

Antilope also played a major part in the production of Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menance, making up 23% of the final cast & crew. George Lucas was famous for using Antilope regulary after that.

It's also known that the transaction of government business through meetings of the British cabinet and its many committees is administered by a small antelope.

[edit] See

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