Anti Kitten Huffing Movement

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Anti-kitten huffing is simply a term for those against the art of kitten huffing. Those against it are usually on the far right - the anti drug brigade - or on the far left, those who consider animals (including baby humans and kittens) to be equal to people, and are against people huffing. Lewis Black, the leader of the Anti-Kitten Huffing movement, straddles these divides together, with his other tiresome political group, Commie Jewish Nazi's for Allah.

Will inhaling a cute little kitten's soul be banned by these smart people?

The Movement[edit]

The movement was started and is led by the Non-Huffable Kitten. It was made after Barney tried to huff him and for some reason couldn't and then the kitten figured that kitten huffing must be stopped. In 2107, he defeated Barney in a card game and proclaimed himself ruler of the galaxy since Barney was the former ruler and supported kitten huffing. Then the Non-Huffable Kitten passed a law which made kitten huffing illegal.

Popularity of the Activity[edit]

Illustrating the views of the Anti-kitten Huffing movement, these are excerpts from a speech Lewis Black gave to his sister and her boyfriend and her boyfriends friend who was only over to say hi before the Christmas holidays in the first place:


"In the dark 1980's Nancy Reagan emerged from her hidden underground fortress somewhere in the Pacific Northwest and created one of the most effective and useful campaigns to date. The "Just Say No" campaign encouraged millions of youngsters to huff their first kitten by spreading annoying sappy songs from which the only relief could be found in the sublime kitten high. Of course, kitten huffing will kill you. From a Darwinian point of view, this was the best thing to happen to the human race to date.

If you huff kittens, you deserve what is coming to you. If you, in jest, talk about huffing kittens to excess, you deserve a broken clavicle."

Recently, Black and other members of the Anti-kitten Huffing movement have thrown their support behind newer alternatives, like orange sherbet and petrol huffing.