Anuskanker

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Anuskanker is a well-known acoustic goregrind metal-band consisting of two members called 'Yo Kurt Kanon' and 'The-other-one-who-is-still-looking-for-a-decent-name'. Anuskanker was founded in 2004 during a lesson of Economics on a college in the barren fields of Zeeland.

The acoustic element of the music is highly important. Otherwise it wouldn't be called acoustic goregrind, or is it you nasty butt-head? Anyway, the unique sound of Anuskanker is formed by at least one acoustic instrument, like an acoustic guitar or a hobbit.

Anuskanker is also Dutch for Pirate Liberation Organisation, invented after the Great Arschloch-battle.

Recordings[edit]

Anuskanker uses an $8 microphone to record it's tunes. This technique results in a very natural and harmonic sound, which is so vital for the acoustic goregrind. Since Anuskanker is very underground and above all, really un-commercial, no money is earned so that everything is recorded and mixed in a cracked version of Cool Edit Pro.

Unlike other bands such as Heerschersch of Pilsch Anuskanker does not use Fruityloops, for it is crap.

Vocals[edit]

Like in every goregrind-metal, Anuskanker vocals are dominated by true grunts from the dark and mystic bottoms of the testicles of Yo Kurt Kanon. The-other-one-who-is-still-looking-for-a-descent-name also manages to scream in F-minor.

Lyrics[edit]

The lyrics are like very philosofic n stuff. They are about life, the universe and everything else, such as pr0n, cum and the Apocalypse. Anuskanker has also covered a poem by Joost van den Vondel, in remembrance of his hanging in 1978 as a result of feeding rotten coconuts to his mum who was suffering from dementia. Because of legal violations we are unfortunately not abled to show you these lyrics. We can't even give you the name of this poem. You might perhaps find it somewhere on the internet, but be prepared of getting a hard-on as you might stumble into a website that contains so-called pornography.

Resistance[edit]

Like any other respected musicians, Anuskanker suffers from rebelling troops, often tree-hugging leftists wearing goat-woolen socks. But do not fear: they are wrong. They will eventually fall into total damnation when Jesus returns.