Assrape Soup

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Assrape soup was known for its radical behavior, and today was no exception. Neither was tomorrow. Assrape soup was walking by my house carrying a sign. It was walking alone, for no one wants to join a protest with assrape soup. The sign it was carrying caught my eye, but then threw it back when I complained. The sign said, "Sorry about that." The words on the sign? Why do you want to know about the words on the sign? Fuck you.

Contents 1 History 2 A balanced part of-- OH MY GOD GET IT OFF ME AAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHhhhh... 3 How to prepare assrape soup 3.1 Ingredients 3.2 Preparation (H)

[edit] History

Assrape soup was developed in 1990 by Emperor George the Eleventeenth. It was also developed simultaneously by Mr. Jew, an associate of Emperor Conan the Oneth. Because of this remarkable coincidence, it was originally known as George-Jew soup, but that was a stupid name. A very, very stupid name. So stupid. So very stupid. The name, it was just very stupid. It was a stupid name.

Assrape soup, as it was called, soon caught on among the bungalows of France. The most likely explanation for this is that everyone in France is gay, and a rapist. Plus they have funny hats. They also hate freedom, which resulted in the adjective "French" being briefly replaced by the noun "Freedom". Soon, assrape soup grew in popularity until it was popular. It became so popular, in fact, that Jesus was once heard to say, "Well, assrape soup is probably more popular than me, I guess."

[edit] A balanced part of-- OH MY GOD GET IT OFF ME AAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHhhhh...

Of course, nobody can eat assrape soup. It won't let you eat it. In fact, it will most likely eat you, like soup did in Soviet Russia. That kind of soup is hard to find these days.

[edit] How to prepare assrape soup

[edit] Ingredients

• 2-3 medium-sized buttocks (preferably from tender young teenage boys, they are oh so succulent at that age, my God, I can't even begin to describe the flavor), diced
• 4 quarts vegetable stock
• 1 cup celery, sliced thinly
• parsley
• nougat (optional)

[edit] Preparation (H)

1. Set diced buttocks in uninterrupted direct sunlight for 16 consecutive hours. You may need to travel for this step.
2. In a large saucepan, bring vegetable stock to a low boil. Add celery, parsley, and specified quantity of shallots.
3. Soak feet in vegetable stock for 10-12 minutes, until golden brown. (Note: if your skin color is already darker than golden brown, bleach accordingly)
4. Slowly add diced buttocks to soup.
5. Simmer for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally.
6. Remove from heat.
7. Rape someone's ass.

Serves one.