Aussies
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Australians or australians live only to be effortlessly better at most things than their pasty white british cousins and stupid, fat, bad-beer-making american allies. You can spot an australian as being an individual with limitless personality and with british ass kicking syndrome. Australia is a country that is filled with both; convicts (really, its a convict country..how baddass is that?) as well as an overwhelming majority of asians, this inevitably results in the participation in sports such as "spot the aussie" in many large cities.
Aussies are an awesome sub-species found on the long-lost continent of OZ, located somewhere at the bottom of the globe (or "the arse end of the world", as they often like to put it). They are notable for their rather nauseating high-pitched whine, love owning the british at their own sport cricket (an area in which they dominate over all, along with most good sports), and their need to constantly talk about themselves. Due to overcrowding, Aussies have started to spread across the planet, and can be found drinking themselves to oblivion in many places around the world. It's true. Look for yourself
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[edit] Political Leanings
OZ is nominally a monarchy, with the Queen Elizabeth II ostensibly the Head of State. In practice however, the majority of Aussies labour under the misconception that rule of their country passed from Princess Diana to Queen Mary of Denmark, sometime around 1999. Most Aussies are considered politically ignorant, and would prefer to be found passed out with an empty can of "piss" (see below). This is ironic, considering theirs is the only country in the world that makes voting in government elections compulsory. Some however, have taken to the political spot-light, and are now dominating the world arena, as can be seen with their current Prime Minister, shown on the right.
[edit] Diet
Aussies have a rich diet, consisting mainly of a cold, brown liquid, known as "piss". This is similar to British or American 'beer', albeit kept at a cooler temperature, and ironically enough tasting less like urine than its aforementioned counterparts. They are also known for eating kangaroos, still born children, and belly button gunk. Aussies favourite food however is The Foot Long Shreemp, as in 'chuck another shreemp on the barbie moyt.' It is quite obvious that this choice of food is directly related to the size of the Aussie penis. Many tourists that visit Australia are female due to the main attraction being the average penis size of 1.3". Other favourite aussie foods include pies, meat pies, delicious meat pies, full of chunky brown gooey stuff, nobody know's what this is, but they still eat it anyway.
[edit] Natural Predators
In the early 1980's, scientists discovered that the young of this species commonly fall prey to dingos (a species of dog). It was initially thought that adult Aussies were the natural prey of crocodiles, but it has recently been revealed that it is in fact the sting ray that is their natural enemy.
[edit] Names
