Bad Nigga Attitude

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BNA
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“A good African-American is not a Nigga! So there ain’t no such thing as a good Nigga!”

~ Jesse Jackson on African-Americans

Just as with funk music and its genesis in the blues, generally the best way to understand anything is to trace its origin and learn all about it. In this case, however, the best way is probably to discontinue reading this hogwash. Still, as you've gotten this far, and provided you have nothing better to do, there is really no compelling reason to stop. Bad Nigga Attitude is the mutated off-shoot of charred DNA harvested from Reichskanzler of Germany, Adolf "Homeboy" Hitler. This damaged DNA was taken deep into the African jungle by evil Nazi scientists hell-bent on creating the ultimate annoyance. These depraved lunatics genetically altered it to BNA by replacing "D" with "B"[1]. The experiments were considered a success in the fields of intermittent explosive disorder and chronic languor syndrome, but were not without the harmful side-effect of playing into the hands of fate - because soon this defiled and highly contagious BNA infected many of the local natives, who, through forced immigration in the guise of overseas job placement, eventually led to an American phenomena which persists even now.[2]

BNA genetics[edit]

File:Nigger-KingKong.jpg
The genetic origin of BNA, Adolf Hitler

Over View[edit]

BNA is not a racial gene any more than Polio is a Polish gene or insanity is an insane gene, and it is not confined to Melanin-excessives. But because BNA originated in Africa, blacks brought from Africa to America originally carried the BNA Gene. While most other blacks transformed from sold slaves into free super-human African-American basketball players, crack dealers, pimps, musicians, entertainers, Secretaries of State, and President, still, those with BNA have only devolved.[3]

Roots[edit]

When God created Adam and Eve, He also created King Kong and Fay Wray. God first put Adam & Eve in the Garden of Eden, and He then put King Kong and Fay Wray into the Garden of Africa. He then named these creatures as Man/Woman and Homeboy/Bitch respectively. In turn, Adam was tempted by an Apple, and Homeboy was tempted by an offer of fame on Broadway. Life was good, and all was well until Nazi madmen, attempting to destroy the World, developed and introduced this altered BNA into the jungle.

Discovery[edit]

Discovered accidentally by Dr. Jane Watts-Compton, these infected savages led by Tarzan, were soon ruthlessly subdued, tamed, taught to walk upright, ghetto-trained, and shipped to America as slaves. But because slavery was illegal in America, Jane and Tarzan were arrested for 'Human Trafficking', and the infected slaves were freed immediately upon arrival in the USA. Little did medical science know that this thoughtless immigration would eventually infect vulnerable people throughout the United States with BNA, spreading orally, much like the AIDS virus did years later.

Freedom[edit]

Although the infected slaves were freed, they had no way home, nowhere to go, and nothing to do. They had nothing to do because slaves don't work for money. It's a Catch 22 because by law businesses must pay the Africans minimum wage, but slaves will only labor for free. And they couldn't be deported back to Africa because they had become African-American nationals. Thus running around idle, these unwitting BNA carriers spread the bad nigga attitude far and wide.

Rochester’s famed and much-loved ‘Good Attitude’

Bad Nigga Attitude is opposite of African-American Attitude[edit]

African American Attitude is white when compared to Bad Nigga Attitude, which is black as coal. Examples: Colin Powell, Sammy Davis Jr., and Barak Obama have an African-American attitude that’s white as Angel-food cake; but Sid Vicious, Eminem, Charles Manson, and Idi Amin are examples of BNA that’s black as Devil’s Food Cake.[4]

Example of Good Attitude[edit]

“Yaosir, Mista Benny!”

~ Rochester exhibits his good and much-loved Attitude

Rochester is at the top of the good attitude list, followed by every other equal or lesser person, who cooperates with society without grabbing their crotch and exclaiming, 'Suck my dick, masta!'

Tyson’s infamous ‘Bad Nigga Attitude’ is as feared as his hunger for ears

Example of Bad Attitude[edit]

“My power is discombobulatingly devastating. I could feel his nose-bone collapse into his brain under my force. It's ludicrous these mere mortals even attempt to enter my Hood!”

~ Mike Tyson exhibits classic Bad Nigga Attitude

Mike Tyson is at the top of the BNA list, followed by every rapper who ever lived. And at the bottom of the list is Tyrone. Tyrone has a Bad Nigga Attitude no one, including African Americans, wants to deal with. Below him is only the La Brea Tar Pits. In fact, Tyrone is like the tar pits in many ways, such as bubbling heat, being unable to associate with, and besmirching anyone who comes in contact.

BNA Cure[edit]

In a 49 year study made on one Kenyan man who was diagnosed and tested positive for BNA, Dr. Abraham Washington Jefferson III has demonstrated that simply changing the atomic structure of BNA, by replacing B with G, thus creating GNA, the result of which = African-American with good enough attitude to mesmerize the entire planet and become leader of the free world over-night.[5]

Advantage of BNA cure[edit]

  • Makes society remember how wonderful a nice human can be. EXAMPLE: Chris Rock.

Disadvantage of BNA infection[edit]

  • Makes society forget how wonderful a nice human can be.[6] EXAMPLE: Mike Tyson.

Bad Attitude Evolution to Date[edit]

Bad Nigga Attitude infected creatures of every species have devolved. Much like their Nazi ancestors, those today with a bad attitude aren't good enough to win WWII or even get a job. Now, if you tell somebody with BNA to over-throw the world, they’ll grab their crotch, and say,

Cquote1.png Nigga, I buy new blocks for war. A few shots, a broad, that make you drop. Then I'ma pop two cops or more. I'm too hot, come through wit two proper whores. Crooked I's the name, man that boy just hopped off the train, wearin' a platinum chain strapped with thang. It's the U gang, doin' it big. You don't like it, you and yo' kid? Get you and the whip, shit Nigga, I spray clips, shots flop quicker than space ships. Then shape-shift yo' facial "Matrix" like a face-lift. So face it, y'all ain't nuttin' to see. Ain't a nigga dead or alive who fuckin' wit me. My left blow connect so hard your head, ho let's go pimp you ass in stead (uh-huh). Cquote2.png

See Also[edit]

References[edit]

  1. "Mad Scientists Tamper With Hitler's Attitude Gene", AMA Digest, March 1948
  2. Book of Predictions - First to Tell You What Happened Last? Circa 23/04/9 BC
  3. Ebony, March 2009 Issue, Page 72
  4. Song: Ebony and Ivory, by Stevie Wonder and Ringo Star, backed by Van Halen, 1999
  5. Ebony Magazine, Cover Story, Sept 2009
  6. American Journal of Pros & Cons, Vol 72, Jan. 4, 1960, Feature, "Know your BNA"