From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Mayor of Temesvar. Is he related to Pedobear?
Typical street scene in Banat
Missing a wheel, no problem
Animals bring joy to the family

Banat is a region of Romania mostly well known for its culural diversity, old history and football team. Or for the arrogance of its inhabitants. Like in every region of Romania, people seem to be more focused at trolling and hating than to live happy normal lives. If we add the diversion factor to this primordial soup of douchebagness we get a solid community where everyone is doing their best in order to screw others. They are part of the larger Romanian community and mostly share the same treats like injustified arrogance, fossilized way of thinking, etc.


The people of Banat are well known for their genetically inherited arrogance. They will use any occasion to brag around and will turn every disadvantage in something worth yapping around. You could say they are conditional optimists. For example:

Fact: Timisoara was the first Romanian town with street ilumination. Actual Fact: Yes, while it wasn't part of Romania.

Fact: Timisoara is the city with the hightest vehicle/citizen ratio. Actual Fact: Yes and when it rains, traffic stops because of the pathetic planned road system.

Another interesting aspect of their arrogance is the revolution time paradox. Although the sparks of the big revolution of 1989 were ignited in Timisoara, almost everyone alive seems to remember taking part to the avangarde of the event, despite the fact that they weren't really present because of various reasons (hiding under the bed in fear, shooting people, not being born yet, etc).

Internet in Banat[edit]

Banat, like every self-respecting region, has access to the internet. Like every other Romanian, the people of Banat are adept of writing wiki pages insulting other regions that they hate. With juvenile humor, of course.

Living in Banat[edit]

Here you have a large selection of cabdrivers who will get you everywhere they want. Before going into a cab you must be very careful to see if the driver is not talking or drinking coffee. If he has any occupation (even reading a newspaper or watching a movie on his dvd player) he will be busy and NOT speak with you. If he is free, gently ask him where he is going and if he can take you there. Probably you will not have the luck to go the same route as him and must ask the next driver. That if there are more drivers there that are not speaking with each other. If you have the honor to find a driver willing to go on your route, you must make conversation with him while he is driving and watching his mini dvd player and bash Moldavians. Failing to do that will make him throw you out of the cab, again, while he is driving and watching his mini dvd player and bashing Moldavians.

People living in Banat/Timisoara/Temesvar[edit]

  • 65% Banatians (that hate Moldavians and Oltenians)
  • 25% Oltenians (that hate Moldavians)
  • 20% Moldavians (that hate Oltenians)

It may seem that there are 110% people in Banat. This is a common misconception, everybody knows that "Banatu-i fruncea" (The Banat is brain.)

The wonderful people of Banat have great education can managemoney very efficiently. For example, when someone is sent to sand niggers or Africa to slave for french corporations they steal the toilet paper from their workplace so they can spend the money on overpriced coffee in Temesvar. Or they steal yogurt from shops in Gabon, because only idiots give money to niggers. Of course, all the money they make by hardworking,and because many of them are genius.

The music here is also the best and all the great Romanians singers came from here. This is a small sample that you can hear while living in Timisoara:Jose Carreras,Shackira,Phoenix,Cargo...


They just love football. Or just winning. Or just winning once. Their football team, Poli Timisoara, is one of the best 6 teams of Romania. There is an old suicide ritual in Banat: just yell anything against Poli Timisoara and you will surely die in 120 seconds. People have to hear you tough, this being a very important part of the ancient ritual.

Extreme driving should be considered. When visiting Timisoara, please keep in mind that everyone is driving using walls, street illumination and people as rebound targets. Avoid red pedestrian crossings.

Gallery of beautiful and unique places to visit while in Timisoara.[edit]

See also[edit]