Battle of Hastings

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I dont think anyone cares about what happened and as far as most people are aware Hiltler started the battle! so heres what i think happened:

The Battle of Hastings contained two forces: Saurons army, led by Voldermort,The rebellion led by Harry Potter. With Frodo and his suspiciously close friend Samwise Gamgei. over the last chicken wing, They defeated the local chicken and chip store run by Sauron and eliminated the meal of chicken and chip. THE AFTERMATH: Frodo was sent to prison for raping Sam. Voldermort and Sauron were given the worst punishment for there crimes some thought worse than death in the evil McDonalds serving burgers to fat families who have cleary never had exercise in their short fat lives.

Contents 1 The Earl of Northumbria's Blunder ( Sauron ) 2 Harrys Victory Over the Sauron 3 Fateful Timing 4 The Aftermath

[edit] The Earl of Northumbria's Blunder ( Sauron )

He let Frodo rape sam, which was exactly what the enemy expected him to do.

[edit] Harrys Victory Over the Sauron

Ron Weasleys desertion left Harry Potter to fight both Sauron and his chief orc, james littlefair, with only a deep frier and the sacred cooking spoon of KFC for help -he had no erection. The situation was particularly tricky for Harry because he had left his wand and viagra tablets at home in order to make room for his many issues of Playboy and Big Issue-his stamp collection was also present. But in spite of the fact that Snape had urged him to bring a form of weapon, Frodo and Sam continued to make love, oblivious to the fact that the ring was in fact: plastic. After Frodo made love to Sam, Harry and Dumboldore made the error of slowing the production of hardcore porn in order to upgrade his Kitchen in Mordor. Harold from Neighbours seized upon this mistake and launched an all out attack on Snapes' base, twice killing his sex slave Hermione along with 8 orcs whores who were posing for a porno shoot, almost the entirety of the army was sexually driven and lost their sacred chicken wings . Voldermort sent Snape no aid, as he thought the sacred chicken wings with barbeque sauce were to much of a risk to be wasted and with Frodo’s member broken, Saurons army proceeded to take his base to the legendary Hogwarts , eliminating the chicken wings completly and shagging all his friends. But it was not a victory without cost – the Gayboys too suffered heavy losses they lost to chicken wings!!! In the end Dumboldore raped McGonigal and started to sing, " Who loves short-shorts? WE ALL LOVE SHORT SHORTS!" Jesus was born soon after this.Coincidently this is how McDonalds was formed. M1

MMMMMMMMMMM Chicken wings..............

[edit] Fateful Timing

It was precisely at this moment that William_Da_B@ST@RD attacked. Casting invisibility on a knight and sneaking it into HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn’s base, William_Da_B@ST@RD’s level 7 arch mage proceeded to teleport the entire Norman army there. Having already used his scroll of town portal in an attempt to bail out XxEdwin_n_MorcarxX, HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn was forced to march his army across the entire map and was unable to use his troll witch doctors to heal his units up to full health. As a result, HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn was not only outnumbered, but his remaining units were also already damaged by the time he arrived to fight William_Da_B@ST@RD. In addition, William_Da_B@ST@RD employed gryphon riders, a hard counter to HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn’s largely Tauren army. Nonetheless, the fighting was close, going back and forth several times before HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn’s level 9 tauren chieftain, Marn Thunderhorn, was pierced through the eye with an arrow and the tide turned decisively against the Saxons.

[edit] The Aftermath

Afterwards, William_da_B@st@rd posted on the official battle.net forums that he had pwned HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn quite hard, and that he was now changing his user handle to William_Da_Conquerer. HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn replied that William_Da_B@st@rd that he needed to STFU because he pwned HARALDHARDASS and almost beat William_Da_Conquerer, too, with no partner at all, which William_Da_Conquerer dismissed by saying simply “please HARALDHARDASS was a noob anyway.” HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn was subsequently banned from the forum, and for generations William_Da_Conquerer’s descendents would seize on this fact as proof that HaRoLd_gOdwiNsOn was not, in fact, a legally constituted monarch.

	This article needs liposuction!
	This poor old lady is not in her better shape, but we wish we could trust your swift hands to bring her back to her former glory. We mean rewrite it!