Bellagio Hotel and Casino

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Bellagio Hotel and Casino
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Because of their so-called intelligence, the so-called experts at Wikipedia will never have a proper article about Bellagio Hotel and Casino. We are sorry for their blatant retardedness.

The Fellatio Hotel and Casino is a hotel and casino (The Fellatio) in Las Vegas, NV. Owned by the MGM Mirage, the hotel (but not the casino) was inspired by the Lake Como Bellagio resort in Italy. The casino (but not the hotel) was inspired by greed. Because the real Bellagio, in Italy, is beside a lake (Lake Como), the Las Vegas ripoff also stands near a lake. The eight-acre body of water lies between both the hotel and the casino and Las Vegas Boulevard, which is more commonly known, by locals, as The Strip (not to be confused with Sunset Strip, a boulevard in Hollywood, CA).


It is no easy task to decorate a hotel and casino of the size of the Bellagio, which is big (116,000 square feet, with 3,421 hotel rooms). One way that the interior designers chose to decorate the lobby was to hang 2,000 hand-blown glass flowers from the ceiling. This "garden of glass" covers 200 square feet, leaving lots of room for the building's chief ornaments, the blackjack tables, poker tables, and slot machines. Designed by Marnell Corrao Associates and Jon Jerde, the Bellagio cost $1.6 billion and employs 10,000 employees, but, its manager says, "It's worth every penny." It earned its cost back by the end of its grand opening in 1998.

Free Show[edit]

Like many hotels and casinos, the Bellagio offers a free show (and many others for which its "guests" must pay through the nose): a fountain equipped with 1,000 nozzles of three types (soothsayers, ejaculators, and studs) can coordinate with 4,000 lights to orchestrate whatever music the show's producer selects, from funky bluegrass ditties to hardcore rock and roll or country music complete with post-nasal drip. The soothsayers read the fortunes of the nearest 100 people. The ejaculators spew the water as high as 25 feet. The studs blasts water up to 250 feet into the air. All the while, music blares and colored lights flash, simulating an intense orgasm. Asked whether the waterworks represents sex or art, the Bellagio's manager replied, "In Vegas, they're the same thing."

Frequent Visitors[edit]

Paris Hilton rented a room in the Bellagio to videotape herself having sex with her last 18 boyfriends.

Sarah Michelle Gellar is also a frequent guest of the hotel, tripping the light fantastic in its nightclub, Light, while her husband and lackey, Freddie Prinze, Jr., visits the casino to check out the abbreviated costumes of the cocktail waitresses, wishing that his missus were as well endowed as they are.