Bullets
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“Hey I've got a few bullets inside of me”
~ Andrew Jackson on bullets due to his love of dueling
“Been there..done that...”
~ 50 Cent on Getting Shot
“I think every bullet should cost five thousand dollars.”
~ Chris Rock on Bullets
“Bullets can be fatal to your health.”
~ Captain Obvious on bullets
“Firing a bullet is very much like making love to a beautiful women, only with one it's not so good to shoot in her face”
~ Swiss Tony
Bullets have been given a bad reputation with an ability to kill people. This is entirely false, as they are actually very nice and usually fluffy.
However, should a bullet
be loaded into a gun, it will turn evil with the potential to move at mach 4.5. If a person should get into the way they are usually dismembered and completely destroyed, otherwise bullets
are completely harmless (unless swallowed, where the
lead can cause mild wind problems followed by instant death)
. Bullets don't hurt people, it's the nasty holes they tear through your body that hurt. However, recent reports have dictated that if you stand in their path long enough, the bullets will simply fly away from your body in awe of your awesomeness.
[edit] History of bullets
- When bullets
were first discovered in 10 AD they were thought to be vegetables. After
a thousand years of consumpsion and millions of people dying, they were
realised to be
poisonous and to cause wind, and so were rendered useless until the invention of the gun in 2005 by Anonymous
. Once invented, Anonymous went back in time and gave guns to Americans, which was a bad idea. Once Americans discovered
how to use
guns
in 1989 they decided
to use peas as ammunition.
However once the British got hold of a gun (the Winchester) they decided to use
bullets instead of peas
. This was
a fatal mistake as they killed
people
! Bullets
were named illegal in 1914 but were then made legal
again by
George Bush
in 19-something-or-other. since
then
the
increasing
use
of them has made
the world
a
better
place
(mainly
America)
.