Burp Stimulant Test

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There are two different kinds of burp tests: One for automobiles and animals, and one for humans.

The first category takes a rather simple, though interesting test. Autos and animals take a test where the animal/auto is tickled in the stomach/exhasut piping. As a precaution, it is feared that animals possibly release chemicals too toxic for the environment, including the most feared, yet sought after and economically feasible stock trade chemical for fartological warfare, the chemical fartium.

Essentailly, the test is exacted differently on humans, though none know why. Some speculate it was created by animals and autos as a creative collaboration and divergent tool to spite those who tested them, and prove that indeed, dolphins do demonstrate higher IQ's than "those idiotic 2-legs" by impressive numbers.

Do not be fooled. The human Burp test is not for the weak of heart, mind soul, or soul train(s).

Repeatedly shown pictures of people burping for 5 and a half hours, victims of excruciatingly difficult burp stimili tests must then undergo a series of written dissertation compilations while having milk poured on their heads. Common essays topics amongst the strata of Burpiological couterpoints, dissertations may include but not necessarily be limited to:

The effects of burping in current social pockets, with a strong influence on the effects of burping's negative connotations in respect to asian cultures

The use of Burping in war strategy, tactics, melee weaponry, and guerilla warfare, and its potential role in specific historical turning points.

The slanderous behavior behind blaming air pollution levels on cow flatulence due to extenuating sulfur levels, and the revelation that burping inherently deduced from the high consumtion levels of alcohol is to blame in conjunction with canada.

Various ways to "Burp" youre way to a PHD: how to woo professors with Burpalicious putrescense and eventually usurp their minds with burptonic force.


As can be noted,

These tests are extremely difficult, and only survived by the strongest of will, soul and soulpatch. (Though burping the alphabet for youre tester will win you a big plus).

In fact, students who do not succeed must retake the test until they do. furthermore, especially in secret east coast Burp Labs, it is a well known secret that professors encourage students who consistently fail to give up and die. For extra credit, successful students are encouraged to burp the failures to death, inciting Burpicide. Sadly, there is not much that can be done by current science to cure those whom are burped to death. Or anyone thats croaked for that matter.


Good ways to avoid taking burp tests:

    Pay the DMV on time
    Tithe at church
    Pet youre dog/cat at least once a day(they see you eeeeverywhere!)
    Avoid killing prime ministers, especially if the come from malaysia.
    and lastly,
         dont fart.
    you dont even WANNA know what that test is like!
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