Camden, Australia
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“We're not racist, even though we hate Muslims!”
~ Camden residents on Racism
“Bogans, the whole lot of em'”
~ Sydney residents on Camden residents
“I am not a racist!! (even though I refuse to endorse the building of a $19M Islamic school.”
“Birthplace of this country's wealth my ass.”
~ Wealthy Australians on Camden
Camden (sometimes called "the Bogan Central of Australia") is a self-proclaimed "historic" town located in New South Wales, Australia. The small and dingy community has recently come under fire from national (as well as international) media because of the residents protests to ban the construction of an Islamic school. Camden residents deny that they are racists, however their arguments crashed when they stated that an Islamic school would "change the character of their community".
After bribing their town council with double the annual town income ($2.50) the Islamic school project was rejected, as much to the distaste of the 150 Muslim families that live in Camden. Completely oblivious, the Camden residents have no idea that their town will be bombed in 2010 by Al-Qaeda informants, who are currently disguised in the town as white-Christian school teachers.
[edit] History
Camden, which claims to be the birthplace of the nation's wealth, was discovered in 1983 by Boris "Wolly" Camden, a notorious Bolshevik leader from St. Petersburg, Russia, who journeyed to Australia in 1980 to discover the secret to the cooking of fine sausages. Upon arrival though, Boris only found rotting potatoes. Abandoning the town in 1984, Boris left his two servants "Igor" and his female accomplice "Brandeen" to clean up the mess of rotting potato skins. Falling in love with the unagricultural town, Igor and Brandeen produced 17 children (Jayden, Brayden, Brandon, Brittany, Skye, Boston, Brent, Trent, Brenton, Mercedes, Schappelle, Kyle, Aiden (with an 'E'), Xander, Madison, Jade and Sheila). Over the years, Igor and Brandeen frequently denied that their children committed acts of incest. 22 years later however, in 2003, the in-bread offspring of Igor and Brandeen had multiplied to an estimated 2,300 (with most of the brothers and sisters having "rumpy-pumpy" at around the age of 8 (the females falling pregnant)).
The Islamic families remain the only basis that keeps the town stable, for the descendants of Igor and Brandeen were and remain unintelligent as well as incredibly "fugly" (fat and ugly).
[edit] Refusal of Islamic school project
The Islamic school in question looks no different from an ordinary, modern-day Christian school. Camden residents however have stated that the finished product, if it were to go ahead, would be "a breeding ground for terrorists." Secretly though, non-racist Australians and Britons have concluded that Camden residents only don't want the school to be built because it would be a better learning facility for Islamic children then their schools are to their children. As of March 2009, paparazzi took explicit photographs of Camden's only school, which from the outside resembles a homeless shelter.
Camden residents oppose the building of the school, stating that it would ruin the Camden landscape. They fail to realise however that the Camden landscape was ruined a long time ago with the dumping of their waste onto their fields. The Quranic Society, who even OWN the land which they plan to build their school upon, is being shoved back constantly by the racist Camden residents. The school, which is said to cost upwards of $19 million dollars (approximately 980 trillion times more than all the non-Islamic Camden residents have ever earned) is even being rejected by Australia's Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd.
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