Captain Scarlet

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Captain Scarlet could remove any part of his body in exchange for not death, but instead, humongous pain.

Captain Scarlet is a Captain in the secret order known as Spectrum, holding the secondary rank of "Scarlet". He is always assigned missions with his good friend, Captain Blue, leading to reports in The Sun of an alleged homosexual affair. Captain Scarlet has been unwilling or unable to comment at this time because he is most likely battling the Mysterons, evil green paedophile-voiced rings of light from Mars that just so happen to be able to take the bodies of recently deceased people. Good news for them when a pornstar dies huh?

But, enough of the Mysterons, back to the good captain himself. Captain Scarlet was apparently rendered indestructible by a drunk-driving accident involving the president of the united states, an SPV, thirty gallons of Jaegermeister and a large breasted airhead named Destiny.

Captain Scarlet has been through many adventures, including a brief stint playing roulette at Casino Royale, Helping to stop a whiny frenchman from being assassinated (We're still not quite sure why), defeating the Mysterons in a variety of ways, Saving the earth from being blown up, and most recently, taking his grandma shopping for new cardigans (That dont already smell like urine)



:User:Zana_Dark
   v  d  e
People named "Captain"

America - Autofellatio - Beefheart - Bligh - Britain - Canada - Caveman - Communist - Hook - Irrelevant - Jack Harkness - Janeway - Kaptainskye - Kirk - Knuckles - Marvel - Morgan - Oblivious - Obvious - Omnipotent - Planet - Raccoon - Selfish - Sisko - Slow - Video