Certiorari
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Also known as the writ of certiorari, cert, Michael, and the 1970's, certiorari is the method by which the Supreme Court Justices pick their Secret Santa assignments each year.
[edit] The Process of Certiorari
Associate Justice Antonin Scalia attaches electrodes to the heads of each Justice on Guy Fox Day every year. From this time to Black Friday, the preferences of the Justices are measured and weighed against precedent. The results of the study show who should buy a present for whom in light of the decisions made on the Court that year. Ruth Bader Ginsburg receives earrings every year, through this method, and Clarence Thomas and Sandra Day O'Connor have been each other's Secret Santas for five years running.