Chairman Drek

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Chairman Mao?
Supervillain
Drek2.png
Chairman Drek
Classification Blarg
Position Ultimate Supreme Executive Chairman
Weapons Device that can fuck huge chunks off a planet, De-Planetizer (Basically made from Spare parts from a Certain space station). Planet Buster MAXIMUS, blows things to subatomic particles,downside is it is being held together by chicken wire, thats why the USA want one, innefective and liable to go horribly wrong.
Loyalty Himself
Barney Bunch
The Blarg
Axis of Evil-Doers
In it for Profit

Ultimate Supreme Executive Chairman Drek is the wonderful and kind leader of both the Barney Bunch and the big pink alien empire on the planet Orxon. He is a penisonoid dick, with a phallic head.

History[edit]

Chariman Drek's history is a mystery, like what happened to 9/11. He overthrew the Blarg leader by sleeping with your mom and starring in a porn movie. This porn tape attracted attention by Blarg locals, who were willing to make him chairman because of his balls. His balls is his head, yes its sad... he is a penisoid.

Scratchit & Wank[edit]

An infobot reveals the location of Drek, so Scratchit and Wank hunt him. Qwark, a green, obese penisioid with Down Syndrome, rapes Scratchit's mom, so Scratchit's dad comes back to see a virgin no more. Anyways Scratchit goes back down, gets a happy meal and Wank falls down a building.

Deplanetizer[edit]

Drek plans to build a weapon that can destroy planets after planets, because he is a hermaphrodite. He injects his semen into the weapon, by squeezing his own head.

Drek, seen trying to suck Qwark's dick for more semen for the Deplanetizer.

His Allies[edit]

Drek has several allies. After seeing a ship piloted by Ratchet and a mysterious robot named Clank, he order a one-time hero named Captain Qwark to deal with them. Qwark wanted to make a comeback and became the highly-paid official spokesman of Drek's planet. Since Qwark wasn't very skilled at ground combat he first lured Ratchet and Clank to his headquarters and let his demonic pet known as a snagglebeast to Fucking kill them. Drek was very disappointed about Qwark not kill the duo. But he gives Qwark a second chance and warns him to give Drek results. He then fUCks Wank to death.

His Family[edit]

Although his parents are still quite uncertain, DNA analysis has shown that Your Mom is his father, and Chewbacca is his mother. It is thought that he was adopted as he parents are not penisioid, but in fact Vaginoid Lombaxes.


His plan[edit]

He intends to fuck various parts of various planets with his gay deplanetizer, making him a LOT like Michael Jackson. When the blarg move to this planet, he then intends to Terraform it to T-0 and start the process again.

Death[edit]

After trying to blow up planet Veldin, he was catapulted to his new planet by his Deplanetizer while it was changing dircetions. The laser was then fired and blew up his new planet.

See Also[edit]