Promotional poster for Chicken Little
|Directed by||Mark Hamill|
|Produced by||Some Guy|
|Written by||Zach Braff|
|Release date(s)||November 4, 2009|
|Running time||720 minutes|
Chicken Little is a 2005 documentary about the life of a chicken named Little. The film was produced by Some Guy in conjunction with Walt Disney, in a blatant attempt to rip off Pixar's animation style. It inspired two video games, one based on the film, and the other Shaq Fu, based on the "film within a film within a film."
This was Disney's first CGI animated film, as Pixar's films were not made by Disney itself, but merely had their logo smooshed on. This was also Disney's first film to be released on DVD as well as Betamax. It also aired on the Disney Channel on March 8, 2008 as Disney's "Month of Shit." The Month of Shit was re-run in 2009 to lead up to the release of the much-chastised G-Force.
The film begins with a group of animal activists video taping a flock of chickens in the oasis of Pokey Oaks Sanctuary. One of the chickens, who they activist decided on calling Chicken Little (Adam Sandler), runs to the highest room in the tallest tower and begins to ring a bell. This drives the other chickens mad, and they soon begin to beat the shit out of each other and engage in wild orgies of sex. Chicken Little runs to the other chickens and in chicken language says "The sky is falling, Oh Em Ge, the sky is falling." After discovering that it was merely an acorn that a squirrel threw on him (because everyone knows, squirrels friggin' hate chickens), Chicken Little is sent to a mental hospital to cure him of his insanity.
A year passes and Chicken Little is soon released from the hospital. Though not quite himself (due to a lobotomy he received), he goes back to school and makes friends with: Abby Duck (Rosie O'Donnel), who's an ugly bitch; Piggy Pig (Miss Piggy), the fattest member of the group (who is ironically portrayed on the movie's poster); Stinkin' Dead Fish (Kenny McCormick), the last member of the group, and the one who isn't understandable. They're also rivals with the Foxy Loxy (Hilary Clinton) gang, led by a very emo soul. The members include Foxy, and Mutha' Fuckin' Goose (Samuel L. Jackson).
During a dodgeball game, Abby tells Chicken Little to talk to his dad or something. It's impossible to hear what she tells him over the screams of pain caused by people being brutally beaten to death with dodge balls. Mutha' Fuckin' Goose randomly grabs Chicken Little and throws him out the window, breaking the glass in the process, which of course he's blamed for. Chicken Little is then taken to the principle's office. His dad then comes, and together with the principle, they beat him with nine inch nails so they can make a viral video for YouTube.
Chicken Little then joins the Little League baseball team in an attempt to actually do something right in life, prove his worth, and hopefully not get turned into a pot pie. During the last inning of the final game of the season, Chicken Little strikes a home run. Sadly this does not stop him from becoming a pot pie at the end of the film.
Later that night, Chicken Little gets drunk and steals a stop sign. Later he wakes up and find out that police have a warrant out for his arrest, based upon charges of stealing public property. Chicken Little calls all his friends over, and together, they decide to hide in the baseball field. This however, would turn out to be a bad idea, as Fish is soon abducted by an alien and his flying saucer.
Soon, the "alien" and his army of clones begin a full scale invasion to capture all of the children on Earth, while the activist are caught in the middle. Meanwhile, Fish is dropped back down to Earth, where he gives birth to an orange gooey ball. The ball demands they take him and the to the alien leader. They do so, and the gooey ball, angry at its father for being abandoned, then eats Fish. The ball then thanks the group for their help, and takes control of the lead saucer and they all leave the atmosphere.
The movie ends with Chicken Little and Abby about to kiss, but before that can happen, a bulldozer flattens Chicken Little, which was ironically driven the activist THEMSELVES, to try and prove a point about the destruction of the rainforest or something. Chicken Little's body is then taken, and put in a chicken pot pie.
- Chicken Little: He's not really a chicken, he's actually a flamingo. He suffers from insanity and angry outbursts. Contrary to popular belief, he didn't come from an egg, no rather, he was conceived when a penguin had sex with a polar bear, creating a unholy super creature which... turned out to be a
- Abby Duck: Is a alcoholic, drug dealing duck, who also happens to be best friends with Chicken Little. She has a total boner for him (how weird is that?), but she doesn't seem to realize that she's a duck and he's a chicken, and that cross species relationships are forbidden.
- Piggy Pig: A fat ass who is half pig, half human, and all fat. The original actor who played him died of cardiac arrest, and was soon replaced by Miss Piggy.
- Stinkin' Dead Fish: Is a a fish of some kind. Not a whale though, because that's a mammal. He's the only character in the movie who is actually retarded (though they all appear that way in the film). An interesting fact about fish, is that he wasn't really pregnant during the filming of the movie, that was actually his really fat stunt double Al Gore. It seems that no one could tell the difference between the two of them.
- Foxy Loxy and Mutha Fuckin' Goose: Two Islamic extremist sleeper agents cleverly disguised as American citizens who hate Chicken Little more than any other American who doesn't look up to them.
- Animal Activists: The group of men and a single woman, who film the movie; they often get involved and disrupt the animals while they're mating or killing one another. Anything that isn't PG they disrupt, even if it kills the entire species and makes them go extinct. As long as it's PG it's alright to do so.
Production of Chicken Little began when Walt Disney's pet Chicken died of extreme obesity in 1944. This left Disney to write the early sketches of what would later be Chicken Little. The early version of Disney's sketches included a giant evil Chicken with red eyes, battle his way out of hell, this later became the basis for Spawn. The Disney executives took the sketches, and remodeled them to make the main character a flamingo (or perhaps a chicken, its impossible to tell). The original story involved Chicken Little escaping from an English poultry farm with the help of an American rooster who he believes can fly. This idea was later scrapped however, when Disney executives found out, that the story had already been done by Chicken Run (which the executives had gotten drunk and watched the night before). The story was redone once again, and became something that largely resembles the current film.
The film was a critical success, despite making only twelve cents in profits, it well exceeded its expectations of 7 cents. It gained a cult following, become a scientologist propaganda film in small rural areas throughout China and central Asia.
The music used in Chicken Little and usually consists of repetitive tunes such as:
- American Idiot (Theme of Chicken Little)
- Every Breath You Take (Theme of Abby Duck)
- Happy Being Fat (Theme of Pig)
- Peanut Butter Jelly Time (Theme of Fish)
other songs include:
- Cooking by the Book
- Like Humans Do
- There is a little known sequel to Chicken Little entitled, Chicken Little 2: Chicken Little Fights Back From The Grave.
- During the filming of Chicken Little, hundreds of chickens were killed and used for food. Not by KFC but again, by the activist themselves.
- Chicken Little is the only Disney movie to get an N-17 rating. Due to the disturbing scenes of bestiality and murder depicting chickens.
- Chicken Little actually costs more to watch than it cost to make. Because it's said in ancient texts: "Thou who watcheth Chicken Little, be damned for eternity." Meaning, if you watch this movie, you lose your soul.
- God hates Chicken Little.
- I hate Chicken Little.
- Your Mom hates Chicken Little.
- Chicken Little hates himself.
- Everybody Loves
RaymondFoxy. Too bad he/she/it doesn't have his/her/its own show.
- Chicken Little has committed a terminal act of self-pwnage because he's not wanted. Many mistook it for an unfortunate gravity-fucking accident.