Church of the angry vegetable
- Statment of Beliefs**********
~In 1874 this angry vegetable carrot was pissed at his friend, so he decided to create Earth and humanity to prove to his friend he was good and responsible
~Anything before 1874 that they talk about in history is lies! The happy vegetable is trying to decieve us! The happy vegetable is a potatoe. He is our enemy our satan.
~ We must pray daily to our angry vegetable carrot.
~The angry carrot vegetable begouth his only son a purple carrot to get eaten for our sins. This vegetable saviors name is Hejus.
Our members are heavily persecuted. People often take us as a joke or think we are mocking them. Not i say Not! Sad examples In california a Angriervegitarian (name of members of our group) was beaten to death brutally because he was mocking Catholicism they claimed.
Knock on door to door each morning at 5:00 A.M. On peoples doors and hand them our Bible and convert them to this church. Sometimes you may have to kind of beat them a little bit for them to take you seriously. Either way it works.
Our Bible is called the "Holy Vege" Some popular versus of our bible
~Eat not the vegetable of happiness but the one of this goddamn fucking funniness, the angry vegetable your goddamn saviour ye! Repent! Rejoice! Eat your Carrots!
As of right now at death nothing continues............................until..........................the day this flying carrot hops into your grave and you burst out alive!!! Only members or people who love vegetables will get ressurected!!