Coffin

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

If you were looking for storage for your recently departed, see Coffin (Corpse Holder)

Coffin is a rare sexually transmitted disease that travels through anal, vaginal, and penal secretions, anyone can receive Coffins, even nuns, no one is safe.

[edit] History

Coffin was first discovered in 1902 by German physician Dr. Doom, the symptoms include:

• Heightened Sexual Desire
• Constipation
• Mild Telepathy
• Extreme Paranoia
• Death
• Convulsions
• Resurrection
• Craving for melted cheese
• Abnormally High Blood Pressure
• Sleep Deprivation

[edit] Treatments

There is no known treatment for Coffin, so if you have it, you are in scientific terms, screwed.