Confederate States of America
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THE CONFEDERACY APPROVES!
Thank you for supporting our cause, brave soldiers of patriotism. Whites everywhere can rest easy knowing the liberal threat to our race is being fought valiantly, theocracy and the GOP live on, and we have instituted our plantation in Congress. |
“Quick, send them back to Africa before they run for president!”
~ a slave owner
The Confederate States of America is the alternate version of the United States. The Confederacy won the American Civil War, defeating the American Union, and later taking land from Canada. Due to a book-keeping error, many modern people think that the Confederacy lost the war and does not exist. We know that these people are either Yankees, stupid, or both. The Confederacy was an all White nation, as in the year 1915 the country realised that their Negro slaves were a danger to the White population, so they deported them to Liberia in West-Africa. However, in 1916 they realised how hard all the jobs that the Negroes did were, and so they imported them all back into the country. The Current President is Pat Buchanan. His Vice President is Fred Phelps and beloved alien Oswald Mosley his Attorney General.
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| Motto: "Et's Err Tern to Shern" | ||
| National Anthem: "Song of the South" | ||
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| Official language | English | |
| Race | Rednecks | Slaves |
| Capital | Richmond, Virginia | |
| Government | Confederate Republic | |
| President | Pat Buchanan | |
| National Holiday | June 8, Jefferson Davis' birthday | |
| National Hero | Jefferson Davis | |
| International Hero | Jaysus | |
| Independence | 1861 | |
| Currency | Confederate Dollar | |
| Religion | Satanism | |
Contents |
[edit] The Birth of a Nation
The Confederate States of America, also known as "Dixieland", " are a group of states that seceded from the United States of America, and showed the world the brilliance of conducting lightning operations. The Confederacy fought for states rights and freedom from the tyranny of a strong Federal government. They decided to go to war after the people of the northern United States, known as "Yankees", "The Union", or "Negro-loving Yankee Devils", had decided to begin passing unfair legislation over Southern businesses. They elected the great Jefferson Davis, President and the not-so great Alexander Stephens, Vice-President. The war in which they won independence, Glorious Southern Uprising I, was the first modern war. This is something Americans say to feel good about themselves. A modern war is one where a country uses its modern economy to destroy another country's modern economy with violence. Accomplishing the same thing with trade is considered to be perfectly acceptable - unless one is in a country abused by China in an election cycle or a French farmer. A few billion people died during the Civil War. Most were from The United States of America. A few of those died of diseases, such as syphilis, the drip, herpes, bird flu, or gangrene. Most were massacred by the Virginia Military Institute cadets and the armies they led in conquest of the United States.
[edit] The Confederacy Today
The Confederacy today holds a peculiar legal existence. Technically, it only exists within the minds of those who choose to believe in it. Therefore it is generally held that the Confederacy only exists within the southern United States. Because of this legal standing, Southerners unanimously contend that sometime in the future they will have to reassert their independence. This future war has already been deemed the Glorious Southern Uprising II. VMI is a front for training officers to lead the future Confederate Army in victory in this conflict.
[edit] International Status
Every country on earth refuses to recognize the C.S.A. except France. The C.S.A. refuses to accept this recognition and in turn does not recognize France as a real country, so it is a moot point. The C.S.A. does however maintain secret embassies and bases throughout the earth, even inside it.
[edit] Main Exports and Imports
See Prostitution. see Cotton
[edit] See Also
- The American Civil War 1861-1865
- Holyoke, Massachusetts
- Massachusetts
- Southern United States
- NASCAR
- Jake Featherston
