Corpse

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“I remember making out with one”

~ Michael Jackson on Dead body of a ten year old he found

“I'm one, and so is my mom.”

~ 'You on You and your mom <insert name here>'

This corpse is happy to be working at McDonalds

When a corpse retires from Walmart they are placed in a coffin for their last 'coffee break'

Corpse is the body of a deceased person. They can be commonly seen working in Starbucks, McDonalds or Walmart. When asking a question, you will usually only illicit a response such as 'huh', 'I'm on my break', or 'arrgghh kill all humans'. It is better to 'respect the dead' and just go ahead and shoplift anyway.

They should not be confused with zombies, zombies can actually be productive in society, view the work of the late Bill Clinton, and recently deceased Nelson Mandela. They still do a great amount of work.

Corpses on the other hand only move when pushed, shoved, or kicked by their boss. When they eventually retire from working in a chain store, it is common to place them into a coffin to rest in peace. Though this coffin is then often just cremated, and turned into a pile of ashes.

[edit] Recreational uses of corpses

• Playing Bingo with
• Sex object
• The centerpiece of your dinner party, corpses are a delicious treat that are enjoyed at breakfast and lunch a Rotting corpse

[edit] Well Known Corpses

• Ronald McDonald
• Gandhi
• Margaret Thatcher
• James Crowley
• Gerard Way
• Nicole Richie

[edit] Films starring corpses

• Day of the dead
• Dawn of the dead
• Shaun of the Dead
• Nothing to Do With the Dead
• The Film in Which No Dead Appear
• DEAD! (the 1988 classic.)
• Just before sunset, but not quite dark yet of the dead
• When Harry met Sally
• Elf

[edit] See also

• Ghost
• Zombies
• Cannibal Corpse

[edit] Fun things to do with corpses

• Eat it.
• Kick it.
• Poke it with a stick.
• Have sex with it.
• Have even more sex with it.
• Cut it open to see what's inside.
• Try to re-animate it.
• Cut off some limbs and then play practical jokes on your friends/kids/grandparents presently on own death bed.
• Cut off some limbs and just use them to beat the crap out of your friends/kids/grandparents
• Drive around town with it pretending he or she is your best friend.
• Donate it to a classroom for science class.
• Build up a collection of different corpses - see how many you can get and trade them with your mates.
• Dress them up in different costumes and show them off.
• Suck the gooey bits out of them.
• Paint swastikas on it and parade it round town.
• Use it for your next BBQ.
• Donate it to McDonalds to help save the cows.
• Use it as a babysitter while low on cash.
• Iron their head so it looks funny in the funeral.
• EVERYONE LOVES MUNTING.