DOS attacks
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'Denial of Sex attacks, a common reaction by women who find their partners surfing pornographic web sites or behaving in any other way in which they do not approve. DOS attacks are rarely, if ever, delivered alone, but are bundled with other service-denial attacks, such as Refusal To Cook Dinner, Hiding The Television Remote, and Locking The Bedroom Door. At one time, Not Talking was also common, but when women found that their partners were actually enjoying the peace and quiet, that branch of the attack was replaced by the infinitely more annoying Bitching Loudly All The Time subroutine.
[edit] Countermeasures
There is no infallible way to counter a DOS attack. Flowers occasionally work, but chocolate is often less expensive and more reliable as well. Returning the toilet seat to the "down" position after urinating, while a small gesture to a man, is often immediately noticed with great delight by women.
[edit] Avoidance
Since you never fucking know what is going to set them off, there is no real way to avoid a DOS attack.
