Don Hertzfeldt

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Bouncywikilogo7.gif
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Don Hertzfeldt.
In a deliberate reversal of his own running gag, Hertzfeldt refused to have either of these people bleed spontaneously, instead opting for the simple expressions of truths regarding two Platonic solids: spoons and bananas.

Don Hertzfeldt is an American animator who is generally credited with the invention of "blood", a humorous, fictional substance which apparently fills the bodies of his nearly all his trademark stick-figure characters. In the Hertzfeldt universe, it is vital for the preservation of nearly every being (be it shaped like an ordinary person, or more like a grape or banana) that its "blood" never pours from its skin. However, it often does anyway, whether as a result of deliberate violence (an act as simple as ripping out a friend's stomach could be all it takes) or pure chance — and once the blood starts flowing, there's no predicting what comic shenanigans will ensue.

Like most of us, those around this poor creature simply do not care about his blood-related misfortune.

The Family Learning Channel, which currently employs Hertzfeldt as a public relations official, has extended the gag to many of its educational programs. For example, Ron Karlston, host of the game show "Genealogy-off", will frequently interrupt himself in an introductory monologue to stick a knife into his own wrist, which has, (unbeknownst to the audience) already been injected with the substance beforehand, than scream and collapse on the floor while yelling a catchphrase such as "Oh my god! My hand is 'bleeding'!" or "I'm a member of the vegetable family!"

Another noted Hertzfeldt gag involves hats, but it's harder to explain. You should probably just see it for yourself.

See also[edit]

  • "Accepted", a 2000 series of shorts about stick figures inventing a scatologically-named college