Double bass

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[edit] Double Bass

The double bass is possibly the main reason for deforestation due to its large size... and it being made of wood.

[edit] Life Saving Use

It is often used as a canoe (which holds 6000-8000 people with space for lifeboats), and can be used to summon man-eating sharks. The film JAWS is actually the story of a double bassist who goes on a rampage after someone tells him his double bass is "just a large violin".

[edit] Musical Use (yes. it is an instrument)

Many people do not know that the double bass also has the secondary function of being an instrument. It has four strings, tuned to E, A, D and "whassit" Sharp.

It can be played using several techniques:

• Using a 'bow': Here the player moves and bow back and forth across the strongs. This is a common technique of playing, mainly because it's really really easy.
• Plucking (Pizzicato in italian (lit. Plucking the hell outta the string)): This is mainly used by dyslexic people who can't master the using a bow. Duh.
• Chopping up the bastard and making it into a xylophone: This is probably the most common technique. Probably most pleasing to the ears aswell.

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