Dr. Sahara

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Those obsessed with so-called experts should thank their lucky stars that Wikipedia does not have an article about Dr. Sahara.

“Count to five, Tamia, if you can”

http://www.asdl.gatech.edu/people/janosburg/photos/2002_mdrs_canyon_small.jpg

Dr. Sahara in his personal air conditioning suit.]]

In the deepest darkest five star hotels of the Cayman Islands resides the insidious Doctor Sahara. Like Fu Manchu, Dr. Sahara is actually quite nice but due to a rare form of OCD, must take over the nation of Congo. Dr. Sahara is a communist. He employs the nation of Zaire, ever since it rose from a fountain in his lovely mansion. When he withdrew monetary support to Al-Qaida following Zaire's replacement with the Congo in 1996, he was set upon by Mr.T. Zaire's Quasi-Marxist mercenaries held off the attackers and saved Dr. Sahara's life. Ever since, he is considered a very powerful force in the Cayman Islands region and plays a major role in CAFTA. He doesn't like either WTO. Dr. Sahara earned his name ever since he sat in the middle of the Sudan and fell into a meditative trance. His identity before this is unknown. It is believed he became one with the Saharan Desert, so Sub-Saharan Africa was logically named after him. He was exiled to the Cayman Islands following the brutal Spice War. This is where he met his cohort Fu Manchu and became the Despot of Zaire. That is where he is now.