Egg nog smithery

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Egg nog smithery is an old fashioned, and historically insignificant form of smithery designed to create Egg nog. The art form is enjoying a come-back in some liberal arts colleges.

[edit] History

The earliest documented cases of Egg nog smithery is found in the area of modern-day Germany, near the Rhine. Archaeologists have found traces in Norse invander camps that suggest early Norse egg nog smithery. Alongside old-fashioned smelters and iron works traces of cinnamon, nutmeg, discarded egg shell scrap, and cream have all been documented.

Egg nog smithery had a breif comeback as an aesthetic artform during the 1780's in Holland. The Dutch population was looking for a new type of art form they master, after painting had declined. Two great Dutch egg nog smiths are recorded from this period, Franz Kierkegaard Vermeer, and Utrecht Noord-Brabant Smith. A popular myth is that the two smiths' forges were across the street from each other, however this is not the case, as contemporary accounts posit that Smith's shop was about half a block down the street. Fiercely competitive, with few disciples (notably exceptional to this are Jorgen Fitzgerald and Dreisch Oersted Jones) the two smiths refined egg nog smithery technique and aesthetic beauty to never before acheived heights of skill and beauty. For centuries afterwards egg nog smithery was confined to attempts to imitate and reproduce the level of craft of these two masters.

However, in the 20th Century, after an unnoteworthy spike of appreciation during the 'Arts and Crafts' movement, egg nog smithery again came into the limelight with modern artists aproaching the artform as a way to escape the dull monotany of traditional painting and sculpture. Three projects were created by Pablo Picasso during the 'Egg nog period' lasting for two weeks of December of 1949, 'Egg nog' 'Eggum Noggum' and 'Three Egg nogs'. All are owned by private collectors. Recently Sotheby's broke a record for egg nog art with the sale, to an anonymous bidder, of Calder's 'Egg-nogmobile' for $1.5 million in 2005. Other artists who experimented in egg nog smithery are: Kandinsky, Schmirnof, Mueller, Carson, Goirot, Dali, Munch, and Schwarzenegger.

[edit] Today

Egg nog smithery, as an artform, is currently being re-introduced to some liberal arts colleges, and specialty arts colleges in the United States. According to Lisa Lindsy, Chair of the Arts and Education Foundation (AEF):

'Egg nog smithery is going through a bit of a Rennaisance in college campuses. More and more often we see competitive liberal arts schools adding egg nog smithery to their course catalogue. Many colleges are now scrambling to catch-up and create egg nog smithery departments on their campuses, making it so that egg nog smiths as teachers are some of the most valuable and best paid. 9/4/03

Some critics have argued that egg nog smithery, along with curriculum offerings of colleges today such as tree refueling, cloud gazing and conversational binary are of no practical use or application. Statistics back this claim, citing that 98% of students who take an egg nog smithery course in college will not go on to do advanced work in the field after graduation.

[edit] Modern Techniques

Today anyone who wants to learn egg nog smithery can do so with the aid of common shop tools. For beginners this is limited to belt-sanders, table saws, and other equipment which will leave the product with a rougher feel. More refined and egg nog-specific tools exist for the egg nog smith, such as the Hellespont (a cinnamon shaving device) and the Ziggeraut, used to bring the cream (or increasingly milk) to a frothy consistency.

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