Erbs
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“I once smoked 60lbs of pure uncut Erbs! my face ACTUALLY CAME OFF”
~ Oscar Wilde on Erbs
“Erbs are very dangerous, the dangerousness is rivalled only by heavy kitten huffing and Yerbs...damn those yerbs”
~ Oscar Wilde on Erbs
“Yerbs own Erbs!”
~ Jimi Hendrix on Erbs
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For years now the word 'Erbs' has been spoken through out the streets, passing from young ear to young ear. Erbs are in fact an extremely dangerous substance, the drug was so strong the government felt the title of a class 'A' drug was not enough, it is now the only class 'ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ' drug which power is rivalled only by yerbs, the newly evolved Erbs (classed as 'ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ times 2').
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[edit] Discovery
Erbs were found in 1066 when William the conqueror and some other guy were in the depth of the battle of hastings. In the charge of the lightbrigade 45 men were lost, this continued until the army poosied out, fleeing to a near by cave. The men first started noticing things when Sgt Pepper and his lonely hearts brigade ate Commander Babel's head, this roused immediate suspicion. The men later realised this was because of the illegal substance flowing through their veins, this made the head eating ok and much more acceptable in society. Anyway, this substance was named 'Erb' after Commander Babel who's first name was Herb, but they couldn't pronounce it.
[edit] Usage
It has been proven, by very smart fat men with glasses who live in small dark rooms, that 4.5 in every 5 teenagers will smoke erbs at some point in their lives, 5 in every 4.5 of them are garunteed to die within 24 hours of the first usage. the highest risk of erb usage is in america, far surpassing the teenage pregnancy level (BLOODY HELL) and the figures have gone into assillions, America have now declared that anyone found smoking erbs will be quarantined until they die, as erb effects are not contagious, nobody knows why they did this, much like the decision they made to vote for bush.
[edit] The DANGER
Erb smoking has many risks, just about any risk known to man is all down to erb smoking. Here are a few of the main risks though: ---Mind Shrink--- It has been proven (again by the fat men) that erb smoking reduces brain matter, the human brain roughly fills 90% of the head (chav's brains take up 30% of the foot....but thats another issue) though heavy erb smoking reduces the size of the brain to about the size of a dwarfed gnome lepricons testical that is abnormally small....it is small. ---Involuntary Death--- This is death, but instead of your average voluntary death (of course meaning you deserve to die, this is caused by; being a chav, being a chav, being a chav or being alive) this is dying for no reason, typical signs of premature involuntary death are saying "dude, these erbs are--" and dying and/or just dying without saying anything.
[edit] IYSEYWDYGTB anti-erbs campaign
The IYSEYWDYGT anti erbs campaign(If You Smoke Yerbs You Will Die You Got That Bitch), this campaign was run by Arnie in his pre 'macho politian if you invade my state i will literally break you' stage. though when he left to govern and yerbs were discovered they had to break up, this was the beginning of new school rock...a sad time for all.
[edit] Famous Erb Users
- Arnold Schwartzen-i have no idea-egger
ERBS ARE HIGHLY DANGEROUS AND ARE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH, REMEMBER YOU SMOKE YOU DIE BITCH
