Fat Joe
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“He was a big man, with an even bigger heart. And an even bigger...”
~ Oscar Wilde on Fat Joe
“He leaned back too far.”
~ Jennifer Lopez on Fat Joe's death
“Yeah, he's really obese...”
~ Shirley Temple on Fat Joe
Jose Antonio Garcia Gonmez Fernadez Pedro Martinez Gonzalez Julian Batista Roberto Juan Cartagena (August 19, 1970 - December 24, 2006) better known as Fat Hoe and Obese Joseph, was a Puerto Rican-American rapper and saviour to many. He also loved to say the word "nigga" though he's not black
Early life he started to work with Lil Wayne, Officer Ricky, Ten Inch Player, Shawty Hoe and Eminem.
[edit] Flat Brimmed Hats
Fat Hoe was born in a Pizza Hut bathroom off flatbush Avenue in The South Bronx on August 19, 1970. It was here he learned to rap, using the scribble on the bathroom walls as inspiration. He performed his first concert at the age of 2. In the crowd was talent scout, and homosexual seal photographer, Bill Cosby. Mr. Cosby immediately signed Fat Joe (who then weighed an un-fat 23 lbs.) to his record label Jello Puddin'-Pops Records. Part of the contract including unlimited rice and beans, something that Fat Joe craved due to his Puerto Rican heritage, and made Fat Joe fat. Really fat. Like... just... fat. So he could stop living his life of lies and just be fat. Fat Joe. Also, he claims to speak spanish, but, as a matter of fact, has only been heard saying the word "mami" and "yo quiero Taco Bell". He constantly used the "n" word (such as nigger, nigro, & nuke you) to his gay black friends and got beat the shit out of for it by 50 cent. So he started eating endless McDicks shit and is considered to be the most obessed indivicual after BIG Daddy V and David Ortiz.
[edit] Death
Fat Joe suffered an untimely death at the age of 30-something. He was discovered in a hotel room by the couple of tour manager Mario and Sarah Michelle Gellar. After leaning back on his reclining chair, his head had split open on the corner of a coffee table, that knocked over a KFC bucket that was nearby. This bucket fit snuggly over Fat Joe's head in which he suffocated. In his struggle, he seemed to have gave birth to a child, "Thomas Xavierito Ivory-Wayans Marshall" the baby resembles a young Patrick Swayze. Fat Joe leaves behind this child, and his brothers Ronald McDonald and Count Chocula.
[edit] Singles
"Lean Back But Don't Fall" (2004 Terror Squad ft. Fat Joe, Remy Martin, Adam Sandler, Lindsay Lohan, Hello Kitty, Officer Ricky, Eminem & Paris Hilton) #1 US, #24 UK
"I May Be Fat, But You're Ugly, And I Can Diet, But I'm Ugly Too, So I'll Be The Same As You" (2006 Fat Joe ft. Panic! At The Disco) # - 452 US, #1 UK
"Drank So Much My Mom Slapped Me" (2005 Fat Joe ft. Shirley Temple #23 US, #666 UK)
"Make Love on the Couch" (2005 Fat Joe ft. Shirley Temple #7 US, # 5 UK)
