From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search


“It appears to be some kind of herb”

~ Joel Grey on Fatwah

“It's like there is a party in my mouth ... and everyone is getting high!”

~ Socrates on Fatwah
Fatwah discovered pyramids, in outer space, during an intergalactic tour.

The Infinite Struggle For Music[edit]

Fatwah, began as an expression of mental anguish to someone. Later on, it was refined and refined, until finally, it became a fish out of water. The fish died, due to being outside of its natural habitat, but the expression stayed the same and evolved further into band form. The band form, took three men to start, and a million generations of people to appreciate.

The first thing the newly band did, was remove the fine layer of goo that covered them. This goo, was a natural part of the evolutionary process, a simple chemical compound. This compound Failed to parse (MathML with SVG or PNG fallback (recommended for modern browsers and accessibility tools): Invalid response ("Math extension cannot connect to Restbase.") from server "https://wikimedia.org/api/rest_v1/":): {\displaystyle G=ExN2+C} has long been used, to explain intra-evolution goo processes. "G" equals Goo, whilst "E" and "N" are "The Speed Of Light" and "Noise" respectively. In length form, the chemical composition is "Goo = The Speed of Light times Double the Noise". All that is left is the "C". To add "C" would be to add cones. And on that note, comes the next headline.


Cones, at one stage in history, were used by the Mongolians, to ward off Vehicles when there was roadworks present. Later on, Albert Einsten, realised that they were made of a fine green plant. With some atomic testing, it was proved that when smoked, it produces a calming feeling. Cottonmouth and the Munchies were also found to be in effect when you smoked the `erb.

Fatwah first used the herb, in a cosmic playground. At first, it hindered their concentration. It was not until perfect refinement, that 40 minute cosmic jams came about. Constant themes included fuzzy rocked out riffs, and wah-wah funk guitar, lasting about 20 days in a nonstop combustion chamber of music.

Joel "Panamic Amsted" Grey[edit]

Joel, was the remnants of the tail, from the dead fish out of water. His tail like features make him suitable for six and twelve stringed instruments alike. His appearance, before cosmic re-evolution was that of a native afrikaan. During the day, he would hunt lion, for the secret heart juices, that would give him the energy to fly. It was around this time, the afrikaan Joel, known as Panamic Amsted, decided to use his blessed powers to bless metal. Thus making metal have the ability to float. This is why, he and the Wright brothers, made machines that would fly, only to create an the "Pan Am" airline. The airline would later be named "Airline of the year" for 1923. This luck would not be long-lived as the very next year, a deal with NASA went pear-shaped and sent the company bust. Unfortunately, Joel couldn't save it, as he already was re-evolved by that time. Thems the breaks I suppose.

Benjamin "Youth Crisis This ... Bitch!" Hopwood[edit]

Benjamin, unlike Joel, decided to devolve into his place in Fatwah. He lived far into the future, helping youths with their problems. Unfortunately, the youths of the future where 14 foot barbarians, that hunted youth workers, so Ben's "help" was firing a magma-powered laser gun. During the long de-evolution process, Ben took the form of many distinguished people, such as the first female president of Vietnam, Tom Cruise's personal assistant and James Hetfield. Eventually, he became the head of a fish, and revolved into bass guitar wielding funk-o-matic known as Ben.

Henry "You're Out Of The Band" Barrett[edit]

Henry, was the left fibular of the fish, and before hand to that, he was a Welsh landlord. He owned property's in West-Leicstershire (North Kent) and Stockport (Lower Manchester). He also owned three public whorehouses in the west end of London. He was well renound for his STD free prostitutes, with the exeption of "Syphillis Sally". Ironically Sally was the prior evolutionary tract of Piianist-to-be "Rhys Flynn". As he evolved through time, he picked up the bass guitar, and later on, the percussions. He loves him some percussions. His drum kit consists of three atomic snare drums, a bass drum, a hippo and a set of baby heads that need to be replaced after every session.

The Gathering of Aid and Other Activities[edit]

Although the three psychadelically charged youngsters were already pretty bad ass, they needed more people to join them in the revolution of the universe. Piianist Rhys "Nakee" Flynn, and Jarrad "Genetic Jelly" Jenkins.*

They first came across the two when they were participating in a rap battle. Things got ugly, and the duo of Jenkins and Flynn beat all. Later on Flynn and Jenkins took on Piianee and Lead Guitar respectively.

Upon discovering the genome for several house hold Jams and other fruit based condements, Jarrad "Genetic Jelly" Jenkins, lives his life as a recluse in the apathetic heights of northwest western australia which coincidentally, resides in Australia.

Jarrad is core, and Im stuck.

The First ... and Last Tour[edit]

Fatwah went on the road in late 2006. At first the tour schedule was Fremantle, Perth City and if there was time Margret River, but their revolutionary style and hit single in the way of "Mr Fletcher is a Cunt" forced a worldwide and intergalactic tour with dates such as New York, Osaka and Mars.

The tour was going on without a hitch, in every senate they played, totalatarian power was given to them. They ruled the world, through shares, and polictical power. At one point Ben and Henry fought a devastating nuclear war against each other, because Ben told Henry his bass sucked. And it did, but Henry became enraged, and sent nuclear missiles everywhere, causing "MAD" or Mutually Assured Destruction. After that, they got over with things, and focused their power on Mars.

Mars was a breeze to play to because there werent any people at all. They spent most of the time taking advantage of the odd gravity situations to explore more ways of smoking cones (see "Cones" above).

Current Activities[edit]

Fatwah are on a "hiatus". They are also sueing Blink 182 for trying to copy them, and essentially stealing Fatwah's vibe. Fatwah does not condone of this activites, and wishes they could all sort things out over some billy's, but at the same time think Blink 182 suck, and want to downsize them.

Nuvola apps important blue.svg This template is blue because this article needs cleanup.
Please make spelling, grammar, or punctuation corrections, reorganize the content, or delete bad content and clichés so this template will cheer up.

Incorrect usage! Please sign with timestamp: {{Cleanup|~~~~~}}