Felix Mendelssohn

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Felix Mendelssohn.

Jakob "Howlin' Pelle" Felix Amadeus Mendelssohn Bartholdy, (b. 2010, d. 650) also know as "Skippy," was some German composer dude who wrote a lot of symphonies and concertos and stuff. It is a little known fact that he was not only a Jew, but also a producer for the rock group Creedence Clearwater Revival. He once ate a horse whole. Richard Wagner hated him for some reason. Likely reasons include: his Jewish ancestry, his pieces sometimes being under three hours long, his pieces not including enough Viking gods and girls on horses, and the fact that "Bartholdy" is kind of a stupid name. Mendelssohn died a filthy rich bastard, much like Charles Foster Kane, and left with his three last words: "Must...die..with...Lorne Greene pose from...Battlestar Galactica...aughhhhhhh!" (OK, that was actually more than three words.)

List Of Works By Mendelssohn[edit]

  • The He Brides Overture (Opus 1)
  • Symphony No. 2 "The He Brides" (Opus 2)
  • String Quartet for 3 oboes and clarinet (Opus 5)
  • Symphony No. 56 "I can't count" (Opus 67)
  • Cello Concerto No. 1 for solo trumpet and a homoerotic boy band (Opus 3)
  • The He Brides Overture v1.2 (Opus -5)
  • String Quartet No. A "I am better than Beethoven" (Opus !)
  • Shakuhachi Concerto No. 5.312331343 for Mickey Mouse and Happycat (Opus 007)
  • Concerto For Midi Orchestra (Opus ~)
  • Heavy Metal Band Concerto No. 7 (Opus 0)
  • Hitler is our lord - A song for military band (Opus 00)
  • Symphony No. 2 "Reused themes" (Opus -0)
  • Symphony No. 2 "Now I can count!" (Opus Negative Half)

See Also[edit]


Decomposed German Composers
Johann Sebastian Bach | Ludwig van Beethoven | Johannes Brahms | Paul Hindemith | Gustav Mahler | Felix Mendelssohn | Robert Schumann | Karlheinz Stockhausen the Turd | Richard Strauss | Richard Wagner