Flaming wastebasket

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The flaming wastebasket is a technical improvement to the traditional microprocessor-powered talking wastebasket; but instead of praising the user for discarding useless items, it offers lengthy and pungent commentary on the material it receives. To wit:

"That is the lamest doodle I've ever seen! Apes flinging feces at the wall are more artistic! And you're wasting valuable ink while pretending to listen to your girlfriend on the phone, if you had the IQ to get my Internet connection working, I'd send her a scan of this garbage!"

"Junk mail!? Junk mail!! Brain the size of a planet, and you think all I'm good for is collecting mass-marketing material! Let me tell you buster, you should reply to every single one of these, instead of wasting my time with this dreck!"

"Ewww yuck, so it's hairballs now. How'd you like it if I stuffed those disgusting things down your throat, eh?"

The only discarded item on which the flaming wastebasket does not comment is another flaming wastebasket; the two cancel each other out.