Flawless Argumentative Masterstrokes
- You may be looking for masturbation and not even know it!
One of the most widespread
fallacies is known by the name of modus ponens. From two premises, of the form and , it attempts to deduce . For example, by the modus ponens fallacy, from the true propositions "the letter A shot the letter B with an arrow" and "the letter A" you would be able to deduce the incorrect proposition "the letter B".
An important open problem in logic is to find out what exactly people mean when they say "the letter B". Leading logicians such as Chuck Norris hope to solve it by building on previous results on "the letter A", which is now considered to be well understood.
fallacies Masterstrokes include:
An argumentative masterstroke in which one person bases his or her argument on the size of his or her penis.
fallacy masterstroke in which one person bases his argument on the premise that his opponent is gay.
reductio ad absurdum:
fallacy masterstroke in which, desperate to win the argument, one person flicks his magic wand and casts the spell of the same name, shrinking his opponent down to a manageable size.
These ancient magical words were repopularized by Harry Potter, the notable dutch politician and transvestite, as he used to run around waving his "Magic Wand" at other politicians changing them into young boys.
Argumentum ad baculum: In which one person attempts to gain points by claiming that actor Scott Bakula, were he present, would totally agree with him or her.
Sucks Is the best masterstroke of all.
fallacy: Pretty much what you'd expect. Generally fatal.
Joint effect: "Hey, man, you know, maybe we're all, like, the same person, y'know? So, when I'm arguing with you, it's totally like, like I'm arguing with myself. You know?"
Fallacy Masterstroke of exclusive premises: In which one person urges the other to get the hell off his land.
Super-sequitur: An argument that makes so much sense that it must be false. "This text is text." Said text is probably Captain Crunch.
Oldest trick: Using any number of techniques, possibly in combination, from the oldest trick book.
The shutting of the pie hole: This subtle technique was originally taught in 183 BCE By the great philosopher/writer Isaac Asimov. It consists of telling you opponent one of a few options including: "shut your pie hole", "shut your cake hole", and so forth with the telling of them to fill their mouths with various objects.