Forum:New Article; Ideas and Advice?

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ISN'T THIS WHAT PEE REVIEW FOR??? -- http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/8/88/Tinymooose.gif » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 13:01, 22 March 2006 (UTC)

Well guys, this is my first uncylopedia article, and its currently lacking in content and the depth that would make this truly funny satire - though I think some of the content could be quite good if it were expanded upon.

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Orochimaru

Any ideas for this article would be appreciated.

For one thing, sign your posts with 4 tildes (~~~~) so we know who made what post. Then if you haven't already, read the Beginner's Guide and HTBFANJS.
Alright, in general most good articles have one of two possible paths. One is where the article is in the form of it's topic (see AAAAAAAAA!, Man uncyclopedia and Writer's Block for classic examples). The second type is taking a subject and writing about it in some type of absurd way (see The artist formerly known as God or Richard M. Stallman).
Unless you have something extremely creative, I would stick with #2 (which is the direction you are taking it anyway). So, with that said, there are several possible directions to take your article. One winning combination is to combine two (or more) completely different subjects. Bonus points if the comparison isn't far from the truth.
You seem to be thinking about writing about Orochimaru's secret lust for young boys. Not a bad comparison, I suppose (I honestly never heard of Orochimaru until skimming over his wikipedia article before writing this), it just needs to be expanded. Why not talk about his arrests? Better yet, his court case, which bears striking similarity to some celebrities's court case? I honestly don't know anything about the show he comes from, but if having the good guys 'find him/hunt his down' plays a portion of the storyline, why not write about how as a registered sex offender his whereabouts are recorded by the government (and the irony that the heroes could have just looked him up)? Or maybe 'analyze' a stolen personal diary entry of his, in which he admits being torn between pursuing the good guys and chasing after young boys?--(~Sir)Nuke || Talk v MUN v Not An Admin v Completely Unimportant 06:13, 22 March 2006 (UTC)
Orochimaru does plenty of stuff to write about. His love of jutsu, his love of young boys, his love of the dead and his love of bingo. Just write about that stuff and you will be fine. --Uncyclon - Do we still link to BENSON? 06:24, 22 March 2006 (UTC)
In short, make it bigger. When I came here I wrote a couple articles that looked just like that, and honestly, i don't know why they weren't deleted. I didn't think I could write these big long articles, but then I just went at it once and it works. If you have a really good idea, you'll be surprised how much you can talk about it. What you have right now is a pretty good opening paragraph (Although, even this, could be expanded.) What you wanna do now is take each little detail you talked about in the opening paragraph and make an entire section just about it. When you're done, you should have a pretty nice looking article. Make a few adjustments, help the flow a little bit, a quick MS Spell check, and you're done! In general it takes me about 1 1/2 - 2 hours to get the bulk of an article written, that's usually working with a few notes I had made during World History or whtever. However, that first 2 hours isn't normally gonna get you anywhere. It's important you keep on working, and adding new ideas to the article when you think of them.
Well, that's about all I've got so far as advice goes. I don't expect anything spectacular, especially since this is still your first one. But over time, hoefully, your writing techniques will improve, and you'll come up with your own little system to write your articles. Either that, or, we'll never see you again. Anyway, good luck. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 06:26, 22 March 2006 (UTC)
It seems to have more random humor than some of my articles that got deleted. Try to make it more coherant and matched with other articles. Try to break it into paragraphs and seperate them into segments. Maybe have an intro paragraph, a history paragraph, a paragraph that says what he/she/it looks like, a paragraph of what he/she/it loves, a paragraph about people chasing he/she/it, etc. Make sure that the paragraphs all flow together and make sense. Good luck. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 23:56, 22 March 2006 (UTC)