Gah

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Gaah! Maybe you were looking for a different Gahh!?
It's Gah... or at least his replacement... named Gah... Anywho, that's his hot girlfriend, Colette.

Gah is the youngest brother in the God family.

However, he didn't show up for work, so his position was taken by a pompous angel.

History[edit]

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the Earth, the angels, and man. Among the angels, he created Gosh and Gah. Gosh showed up for work everyday, but Gah disappeared. He cannot be found and currently has a search team looking for him.

So when his position opened, Mr. I Think I'm so High and Mighty jumped in and took the position for him. He is now serving as a devils advocate in hell.

Powers[edit]

Gah, like his brothers, has been blessed with powers. However, they are much lesser than those of God and Gosh.

Gah can however, punch you when you blaspheme against him. In fact, when you say his name, he'll teleport in front of you and punch you in the gut if he's feeling like it. He also has a bow that shoots a stream of arrow, that he uses to torture environmentalists that believe we shouldn't eat meat(Gah however, doesn't eat, being a lifeless being demigod. He just likes to pester vegans though. The angel chicks think it's hot).

Overall though, Gah's nothing too splendid. He however, makes up for this by his coolness factor, which is agreed by many theologians to be "...off the charts."

Coolness Factor[edit]

Gah is worshipped for his coolness. I mean, he's the master race, he wears sunglasses, a matching outfit, and he's single.

Earth women find him hot, and every guy wants to chill with him.

Except the homosexual men, who find him hot as well. The lesbians immediately change their sexual preference. As do the heterosexual men.

Accomplishments[edit]

Gah(Or Gah's replacement, renamed Gah, so still Gah) mainly joined the position for the sake of getting other hot angels. Everyone likes someone with power, and that's the same with Gah.

In which case, Gah made sunglasses fashionable in heaven, as well as ghetto old-English speak ("Word to thy forebearer, bitches!"), which he blessed man with.

He also beat up Stan while Gosh was busy taking his vitamins. He however, had trouble with Santa whom often jumped on his back and road him around like a piggy... Gosh had to jump in then.

Campaigns[edit]

Gah is currently in several campaigns, against those who go against the Holy Trinities.

Satan[edit]

Gahs current battle on Satan is not going to well for him. Gah has already been beaten up, and his almighty gut punch is wearing him out. Everytime he gets in a fight, Jesus has to bail him out.

Stan[edit]

Gah pretty much beats Stan at everything. I mean, come on. Stan is pathetic, and Gah knows that. In high school, while Stan was doing his math homework, he'd give him wedgies. So while Gosh is busy with Stan Gah is working in the background.

Santa[edit]

Gah just looks at Santa and calls him "an inferior being." Santa often gets ticked at this, and gives him coal. It's heard recently though, that Gah is starting a career in energy.

Stahn[edit]

Who?

May be the alter-ego of Stahn Aileron...

Gah's locations[edit]

Where can you find Gah, not find Gah, and help find Gah? Read below.

Places to find Gah[edit]

The following are places to find the new Gah. The other Gah is being searched for as we speak. Please pray for him.

  • Nightclubs
  • Bars
  • Tall Towers
  • Endless Towers
  • Under the seals on your postage stamps.
  • Church
  • Church Bars
  • Church Nightclubs
  • Church of Martel
  • Macking on yo woman
  • Giving Stan wedgies
  • At the Official Namco Forums
  • Tales of Symphonia

Places to not find Gah[edit]

You cannot find the new Gah in the following places. You might however, find original Gah there. If you do, please contact authorities.

The Search for Gah[edit]

Gah is currently being searched for as we speak. If you have seen Gah(original) please call your local police station.


The Christio-Religio Ladderal Hiearchy
CRLHladders.jpg Top Rung, the Holy Trinity: God, Jesus, & the Holy Spirit, opposed by Satan

Middle Rung, the Holy Triforce: Jeez, & The Holy Ghost, opposed by Stan
After a few drinks: Daddyo, Laddyo, & The Spook
Bottom Rung, the Holy Tripod: Gah, Jesús, & the Holy Rock, opposed by Santa
Fell off the Ladder: Goo, Jazz, and Hollywood, opposed by Stalin