Wacky Gameshows that don't Exist, but should
Wacky Gameshows that don't exist, but should is possibly the best list ever of, you guessed it, Wacky Gameshows that don't exist, but should. All fields are covered here.
- 1 Gameshows Involving Ingestion of Substances, Foods, or Animals
- 2 Gameshows Involving Violence
- 3 Gameshows Involving a Wheel Spinning
- 4 Gameshows Involving Deadly Diseases
Gameshows Involving Ingestion of Substances, Foods, or Animals
Swallow an M82 Barett sniper rifle without getting choked, or having a metal detector go off after swallowing and you win $100,000, the rifle, and a years' supply of bullets to shoot!
Under the Sink
Whoever can ingest the most household cleaner in five minutes without dying wins $100,000 and a free stomach pumping at the Mayo Clinic, and a bottle of edible household cleaner.
Whoever can fully huff the most Hitlers in 30 minutes wins a year supply of Ricearoni, kittens, and $35,000.
Whoever can drink 10 bottles of industrial-strength laxative without crapping themselves wins up to $85,000 in fabulous prizes! Along with a year's supply of diapers. Constipated old people would have an unfair advantage at this one.
Contestants must consume the amount of hits of LSD that is indicated by a piece of paper pulled out of a hat, then divide themselves into the judge, the jury and the defendant team and the offending team. The host will then pick a hilarious crime, and ask the trial to proceed as conducted. The courtroom also has bonuses that arrive from time to time, like a killer yeti pizza man seen in Freeski. Whoever wins the trial will get Gatorade dumped on them and have a wax figurine in the court room for the next game. The animation artists then add their rendition of what the contestant might have seen based on their description.
Gameshows Involving Violence
These gameshows involve violence, usually enacted upon the contestants.
Cleaved In Half!!!
The contestants are asked a series of questions, then they are promptly cleaved in half. That's right, they don't even get to answer. However if they got the answer right... well, they still get cleaved anyways. Fun for children of all ages!
Let's Get a Swift Kick to the Nuts
Whoever is left standing after Hans and Franz are done is the winner of $60,000 or a new Lexus!
Three lucky contestants will get a free trip to a local elementary school and punch out as many children as they can in 15 minutes! Bonus points for cripples and the "special" students.
Those able to survive 60 minutes of merciless torture at Guantanamo Bay without breaking down and revealing their terrorist plans get free amnesty and a Blue Oyster Cult medallion.
In this twisted version of Pac-Man played in a large residential area, one player is chosen to be the homicidal maniac, three people are chosen to be innocent pedestrians, and the police guest star as themselves. Gameplay differs for each player.
- Homicidal maniac: The objective of the homicidal maniac's game is to successfully hotwire or carjack a car, without the police noticing. Once in the car, the homicidal maniac must avoid the onslaught of police, and turn the innocent pedestrians into roadkill. At the end of the game, he is paid relative to the amount of innocent pedestrians he has slaughtered, and how long he has avoided getting 'busted'.
- Innocent pedestrians: The objective for the innocent pedestrians is to survive until the game ends. No pedestrian has ever completed this objective.
- Police: The objective for the police is to catch the homicidal maniac, preferably before he kills any pedestrians. In reality, they tend to sit around and eat donuts, and if they do finally decide to give chase, then they tend to crash into the nearby river, or a telephone pole.
10 Z-list celebrities, trying to revive their careers, are put into a jungle with guest Arnold Schwarzenegger and the Predator from the film of the same name. Whoever can survive, wins! Hilarity ensues!
Celebrity Russian Roulette
A bunch of well known bimbos, aka z-list celebs who are famous but no-one knows (or cares) why - play Russian Roulette for real. With a bit of luck they will all end up blowing their own brains out (providing they can understand the rules of the game, that is). Maybe the last bimbo standing wins the honor of blowing her brains out in an exotic location. Who knows, or even cares?
Dancing with the Unreliable Car
Celebrities dance with cars that don't have brakes, driven by homicidal maniacs. Last man standing gets to keep their car.
Contestants have to abuse Hughes in any way possible. The challenges range from shooting him in the toe with a gun that shoots swords to showing the Hughes grandmother all of his porn. Each week the Hughes will be forced to battle a celebrity, to the death. However because there is a chance that the celebrity may die, their lawyers will wish to speak to our lawyers (who coincidentally will not exist until some other lawyers wish to speak to them) about the possibility of death. Therefore it is necessary to use robots that are like Arnie in The Terminator so that they look like the celebrities but are actually robots.
Fun In the Washing Machine!
10 contestants all climb into a washing machine and go through the entire washing process! Whoever goes through the most time and cycles wins 100,000 dollars and a gun-that-shoots-ninjas!
Nihilism and a Gun!
5 contestants are converted to Nihilism, last one to kill themselves gets nothing because it doesn't matter and he will die anyways so really this whole thing is pointless
Gameshows Involving a Wheel Spinning
Like Wheel of Fortune, but better.
Wheel of Fish
One of the three lucky contestants could win his or her weight in fish! Fish cooked by request only. Also available to choose: an empty box; round the clock protection from the fish mafia.
Wheel of Famine
Seven lucky Pharaohs get to find out which disease Bob has in store for them!
Wheel of Torture
One contestant is put on one of those wheelie-type things you see at the carnival and the other contestants throw stuff at him/her, such as rusty nails, sporks, and darts (preferably dipped in poison). Anything that hits the person on the wheel is theirs to keep, plus $250,000 if they live a whole half-hour!
Wheel of Time
Contestants are put in a straight jacket and tied to a conveyor belt that leads to a set of grinding wheels made for the specific purpose of tearing contestants into shreds. Contestants must escape from this mild predicament, then walk through a door and fight an epic battle against five hundred ninjas, and do this armed only with a butter knife. If they survive this, then the rancor is released.
Surviving contestants are awarded a pat on the back and two dollars in quarters for the payphone located outside the studio.
Wheel of Pandas
Whichever contestant kills the most pandas gets a governmental pardon and a free panda (dead or alive, their choice).
Wheel of Nothing
Contestants spin a wheel just for the hell of it. No cash. No prizes. Just wheel-spinning.
Wheel in the Sky
The contestant must go on a magic carpet ride to one of many game-show platforms in the shape of a wheel positioned in geosynchronous orbit. They must spin the wheel deciding whether or not they should send a letter or a postcard, then another wheel on what type of weather they should send it in; i.e. a long summer day or in a blizzard in which you will have your balls frozen off. You must then decide if you want to make it out of silver or clay. Silver allows for a bigger pay-off, but higher risks, so clay is for those who like to play it safe.
Afterwards, the contestant is sent back to earth in an escape pod, where they usually land next some dusty old road, about a year or two away from the home and family and/or internet pr0n.
Wheel of Wheels
Contestants spin a wheel to determine which Wheel game to participate in.
Wheel of People
Contestants are placed in a wheel, resembling the one commonly used by hamsters. they scamper around hamster style, and must roll their wheel one kilometre. The losing team is placed in a wheel and rolled down a VERY steep slope, for laughs.
Wheel of Mucus
“I'd like to buy a bowel.”
Contestants are chosen out of random from the U.S. population and are made to spin a wheel, upon doing so they are instantly covered in mucus and set on fire, their family wins the grand prize of the funeral bill.
Gameshows Involving Deadly Diseases
These gameshows involve at least one of the contestants contracting a horrible, possibly fatal disease.
The Hooker Show
Avian Influenza: Europe
The show gets several hundred birds with bird flu and sets them loose on a live studio audience! All audience members receive $10,000 compensation and a new printer/scanner/fax if they don't get bitten!
The Spanish Armada
Six blankets are rubbed all over six contestants. Only one of the blankets is infected with smallpox! Whoever gets it will win $800,000 and a BRAND NEW PORSCHE!
Super AIDS Press Your Luck
The Ebola Button
Isn't this self-explanatory?
Who's Got the Clap
A man or woman goes on a blind date with 3 members of the preferred sex. Where 2 out of their 3 dates have gonorrhea and the lucky single gets to guess which one it is!