General

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
A general, looking stylish.

“Charge!!!!!”

“Ready, aim. Fire!!!!”

~ Admiral Meyadow on Spartan War

“For SPARTAAAAAA!!!!”

~ 20 Spartans on Spartan War

“Hey, this is Son of Sparda.”

“ if a general is so amazing, why is he called a GENERAL??”

~ That guy on Generals

“As for being a General, well, at the age of four with paper hats and wooden swords, we're all Generals. Only some of us never grow out of it. These people are usually fired because they have the brains of four-year-olds.”

~ Sir Peter Ustinov


Ah, armies. Where would we be without them? (A Shithole, that's where)

And, incidentally, where would we be without leggies?

Armies don't command themselves. No, that's a job for a General aka Admiral Meyadow. The word "General" comes from the Latin word "Generus" which in the old days meant that if you were generous with your ability to kiss butt, you would then get promoted to the position of Generus (or Generus Maximus) and then you would be able to kick butt.

Or something like that.

Meaning of the term[edit]

Generally speaking, the term is used by nearly every country in the world! And that includes Switzerland, in which the term replaced the older term knifemaster.

While historically an army rank, General is also used in many air forces, although many air forces are based on the British Royal Air Force system and use the ambiguous Air Marshal instead, with the even more ambiguous Air Officer being the generic title for general officers in these air forces. Air Officer could really mean any officer of any organization that happens to be in the air; e.g. traveling on an airplane, jumping, falling to their death, and so on and so on. This problem is eliminated with the use of the far superior rank of General instead.

Does that make sense?

If not, just go here.

General Officer Ranks[edit]

Common systems[edit]

There are two common systems of using general ranks. One came from Great Britain, and the other came from France. Then the United States of America showed up and laughed in their faces.

Old European system[edit]

UK-Army-OF9.gif
Field Marshal
General
Lieutenant General
Major General
Brigadier (General)

As you can see, the top rank is not a General. The United Nations is working around the clock to fix this problem.


American system[edit]

USAGENO10.gif
General Electric
General Motors
Peasant

Capitalism at its finest.

Spork.jpg This page was originally sporked from Wikipedia:General.