Gloucestershire
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| This article has been adopted by: MacMad |
Gloucestershire (pronounced Throatwobbler Mangrove), is an English county which has both the River Severn and the M5 Motorway running through it. This means not only do cars speed through it very fast, but boats from Ireland (usually homosexuals or people with limbs that wave about randomly) end up in Gloucestershire by accident.
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[edit] Location
Gloucestershire borders Wales to the west, Herefordshire and Worcestershire to the north, Oxfordshire and Wiltshire to the east, and Zimbabwe to the south.
[edit] History
Gloucestershire was invented in 1907 by a Sir Desmond Gloucestershire, which is where it got its name. Most of what is now Gloucestershire was county called Arse, plus parts of Wank, Tit and Poo (now desolved as parts of neighbouring counties).
[edit] People
Contrary to popular belief, Gloucestershireans (as they are known throughout the world) do not have three legs, only one arm, and deformed (if sometimes compeltely missing) genitalia; they are in fact just like normal people other than they run naked through fields to get to work, and swim to the shops.
[edit] Activities
The people of Gloucestershire are known to enjoy a wide range of unusual but exciting pasttimes, including:
- running after cheese,
- running away from cheese,
- running sideways
- rape,
- and of course bouncing on stilts
[edit] Temporary Disappearance & Subsequent Rediscovery by Bob Geldof
During the Great Plastercine Crisis of 1986 (but probably entirely unrelated), Gloucestershire was temporarily misplaced. This lasted for three whole days, and during this time, anyone trying to enter the county would end up mysteriously out the other side in the next county. The county was then found by Bob Geldof.
