Grand Theft Auto: Antarctica

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
P-P-P-P-P-P-Pick up a copy!

Grand Theft Auto: Antarctica is a part of the Grand Theft Auto series. In this installment you play as Flip Dropper, a member of the Penguin gang desperately trying to hold onto it's territory. Their area is under threat from numerous other gangs who want to assert their power in Antarctica. The aim of the goal is take control of Antarctica thus allowing your gang to run free in the tundra.

Characters[edit]

Flip Dropper

Flip has spent his whole life as a Penguin Gangsta. Since birth all he's known is violence on the mean ice streets of Antarctica where the only option is to fight or die or become the number one sound in Belgium. He is arrogant, tough and above all a Mormon transvestite. He only has time for the penguin cause and doesn't take any prisoners. A lot of the missions in the game involve making Flip waddle over to the other territories and generally annoy the other groups by slapping them with his pingas.

The Emperor

Leader of the Penguins. He considers Flip to be his right testical and relies on him to carry out a lot of the dirty work of the penguins. He rose to power making many enemies on the way, most notably are the Polars who he swore vengeance on since they once stole a fish he was about to eat. His one flaw is his inability to look up without falling over.

Harlten Cheston

Leader of the Hunters. He is a gun crazy old man who loves guns so much he married his rifle. After hearing of the amount of money that could be made by selling whale, polar and penguin skins to furniture companies in Scandinavia, Harlten picked up his rifle and bullets and got the first flight to Antarctica. With a hardy bunch of fellow aggressive hunters, they vigorously terrorise the area. They can be identified by their gnarled expressions and the sound of their gums smacking as they chew tobacco.

Shamu

Leader of the Whales. Sings songs that are totally unrecognisable however by recording his and his friends songs they have made thousands upon thousands of pounds by selling them to New Age travelers and other hippies. They have yet to fulfill their dream yet of a number one hit on the charts and hope that by taking over Antarctica, the extra exposure could mean their dream is realised.

Edgar Allan Poelar Bear

Leader of the Polars. Commonly known as Ed to his friends he is one big scary mutha. His roar is so powerful that it can knock over any of the Penguins and Hunters and it's natural camouflage ensures it can disappear into the landscape with ease. Tells very frightening horror stories to entertain the other Polars. Always up for a fight, he usually attacks without warning. Except for the heavy sound of his footprints on the thick snow of course.

Philosopholis Thompson Philosopholis Thompson is a worldwide terrorist whose followers must be destroyed before the game can be won, although Philosopholis himself is never encountered during the game, he is often mentioned by other characters, especially by his nickname 'Big Pee'. His followers are part of the Pee Gang, and often armed with small fish. Despite there calm appearance, all are trained assassins.

Flip and The Penguins plan how it's gonna go down...

Gangs[edit]

  • The Penguins - Flip's gang and the one you control in the game. They are a fierce group who don't let the handicap of having no arms or legs stop them from doing what they want.
  • The Polars - The meanest group of bears alive. They are ruthless and bloodthirsty, willing to do whatever it takes to become top dog (or bear in this case, hee hee) in Antarctica. Their income mainly comes from their sponsorship deal with Fox's Glacier Mints.
  • The Hunters - In Antarctica for profit, they've come to skin all the animals alive and use them for upholstering furniture. They may have guns and harpoons but lack raw animal instinct, the stupid logical thinking fools!
  • The Whales - Their singing can be heard off the shores off Antarctica and Flip comes across them in the swimming missions. Their leader Shamu is a gentle creature however when angry the entire continent quivers in fear. Hate references to Free Willy.
  • The Seals - The weakest gang in the entire game, all the seals do is bark and lick you to death and even if you just stand in front of them and do nothing they still won't kill you, from the start of the game they supply Protection Money to The Penguins but betray them and defect to The Killer Whales because they threaten them.
  • The Killer Whales: The strongest gang in the game, merely going into their turf makes them slice you into pieces. To actually kill them you need to recruit twenty penguins and throw snowballs in their eyes then input the health cheat 1000000000 times and then put in the "Blow up all cars" cheat to slaughter all of them.
  • The Documentary Film Makers - An innocent group who are merely in Antarctica because of an assignment laid out by the Discovery Channel. They are pacifists but nearly always get caught up in the bloody crossfire that occurs nearly every day in the snow desert. All the other gangs despise them.
  • Heather Mills McCartney - An aspiring seal hunt activist and amputee. Getting too close to her will either end by marriage and an accompanying lawsuit/smear campaign against you or by being smacked in the face by her prosthetic leg.

Weapons[edit]

  • Snowballs - Unlimited amounts. You can pick these up anywhere in the game.
  • Guns - Can only be used by The Hunters. Other gangs merely look at them and prod them a little bit before moving on.
  • Rocket launcher disguised as a video camera - Can only be used by the Documentary Film Makers. Other people think it's just a video camera.
  • Heather Mills-McCartney's prosthetic leg (if you can get it off of her mid-swing).

Game Cheats[edit]

Blow up all cars (And Whales too): Up, Down, Circle, Triangle, Left, Down, Up

Cause Global Warming: Always on.

Unlock Oscar Wilde: Square, Down, Square, Down, Square, Down, L1, R2, R1

Recruit any animal: Up, Down, L1, L2, Square, Triangle, Down, Left, Up

Melt Antarctica: Down, Up, L1, L2, R1, R2, Right, Down, Left, Right, Up

Recruit Chuck Norris: Up, Square, Right, Left, R2, R2, Up, Down, Down, Round House Kick

Dancing Penguins: Happy Feet (PC Only, sorry.)

Vehicles[edit]

  • Ice Skates
  • Husky Dogs and Sleighs
  • Snow Cat
  • Helicopters and Bulldozers (To get them you must jack them from The Hunters)
  • Penguinmobile
  • Snow-powered rockets

Soundtrack[edit]

  • Informer by Snow
  • Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice
  • Walking in the Air by Aled Jones
  • In This Home On Ice by Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
  • Snow by Red Hot Chili Peppers
  • Cold as Ice by Foreigner
  • Through the Fire and the Flames by Dragonforce
  • Pimping Ain't Easy by Ice-T
  • World So Cold by Mudvayne
  • Let it Snow by Bing Crosby
  • Cold by Crossfade
  • Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta by Geto Boys
  • Frozen by Madonna
  • Spongebob Squarepants Theme
  • Every song by Coldplay
  • Hello by Ice Cube
  • Trapped Under Ice by Metallica
  • Hot N Cold by Katy Perry
Grand Theft Auto
Games
The Lost Games Lego Island | Cosmo | Poop City | Tatooine | Television City | Television City 2 | Television City 3 - The Wrath Of Dob
Grand Theft Auto III era III | San Andreas | San Andreas Stories
Grand Theft Auto: We're Running Out of Ideas era Hill Valley | Theft Under A Thousand | Beirut | New Orleans | Vatican City | Vatican City Stories | Antarctica | Somalia
Currently in Production Jerusalem | Norway | Philippines | Santiago
Non-canonical Grand Theft Audio | Grand Theft Election: Bush v. Gore